I quite honestly don't know what's going on in here and with my mom. Yesterday she was her old self.. alert, taking, awake, etc. Even after they put the ng tube in to feed her. She was fine.
Today... is a whole other matter. She is delusional at times, sleeping most the time, quiet... to get her to talk you pretty much have to beg her and even then you'll only get a grunt for a few words. A lot of words are not coming out right. "you" came out "slew" sort of. And earlier when she pulled out her feeding tube while Michelle the nurse was here, she was literally babbling like an alien being. Then all of a sudden she was clear as a bell.. then babbling again. It's very strange.
No one can tell me what the hell is going on. Almost 2 weeks ago I was promised to be hooked up with a social worker to help me deal with the stresses here and at home, with my family and even the stresses on myself. That never happened. No one ever approached me. The only people that have been any support to me are Michelle the nurse, Michelle the dietician and Vicky the care manager. But it's not their job to be a social worker.
I sit here, day in and day out, for hours on end. Some days I'm here 10 hrs.. some more.. some less.. and unless my mom is having a good day like yesterday this blog is all I have. To talk to my mom about what is going on is difficult since she doesn't remember what brought her in here. She has been out of it enough that she doesn't even realize how long she has been here. It will be 2 weeks come tomorrow night.
So she pulled the feeding tube @ 10:30 am and I talked to the Dr about putting it back in around 1 pm. She told the nurse to call her when she had time. Needless to say, it's now 6:25 pm and the nurse didn't call her yet. When the hell are they going to do this? So I just asked the nurse about 15 minutes ago if this is going to happen and I reminded her SHE was suppose to call the Dr to let her know she had time to help with it. I think she finally asked the Dr but I'm really not sure.
Sunday, August 31, 2014
Saturday, August 30, 2014
Saturday August 30th/2014
geez I didn't realize how long it's been since I added to this. Been really a hectic time for me with my seniors program and mom in the hospital.
Several things have happened, some for the good, some not so good. On the good side they called my family Dr who convinced them to give her her regular pain meds again so she's in little pain. Well.. other than the tummy pain but even that is subsiding some and not constant anymore. thankfully. The dietician here has also convinced them to put her on her swallowing medication as well. So that's another really good thing. She's still not eating really though.
So on Friday I gave permission to put the ng tube in to feed her and convinced her it was the right thing to do even though she wasn't all that thrilled with it. They put it in on Friday morning and she was actually ok with it. :-) However when I came in in the morning I discovered the nurse trying to give her a supershake. I told her she's not drinking them and that's why we put the feeding tube in. So she says... are ya ready for this?? "oh.. well can you get her to drink it because I crushed her medication and put it in there!!"
I wanted to ask what damn planet she's on... but I bit my tongue and said instead "why do you think we inserted the feeding tube?" She won't drink that. And why did you crush her medications because she won't take them crushed either, they are horrible when crushed. It says right on her card to give her the meds ONLY with applesauce and intact, not crushed". She tells me "well I never had her for a patient before". So I remarked.. "then you don't read the instructions on her chart"???
So now she is trying to give her meds in a drink that she won't drink which is the reason for the feeding tube. for crying out loud. Give me a damn break.
Anyway, my mom actually had a good day yesterday even with the insertion of the tube. She was awake most of the day, talking to everyone, etc. Was a really great day.
Then I came in here today at noonish and there she is.. all smiles to see me and eyes wide open... AND NO FEEDING TUBE!! Turns out around 10:30 am she decided she wanted out of bed and she also pulled it out. She told me it was a lie... she didn't do it.. a nurse took it out!! good grief. So I talked to the Dr's again and they are going to put it back in because she really needs the extra protein and the liquid food for the next few days. But.. they are also going to put "mittens" on her. These big puffy mittens that will stop her from pulling on it. While I'm here watching she can have them off but when I'm gone they will have to put them on her in case she tugs at it. hoping that's the one and only time she does that.
Several things have happened, some for the good, some not so good. On the good side they called my family Dr who convinced them to give her her regular pain meds again so she's in little pain. Well.. other than the tummy pain but even that is subsiding some and not constant anymore. thankfully. The dietician here has also convinced them to put her on her swallowing medication as well. So that's another really good thing. She's still not eating really though.
So on Friday I gave permission to put the ng tube in to feed her and convinced her it was the right thing to do even though she wasn't all that thrilled with it. They put it in on Friday morning and she was actually ok with it. :-) However when I came in in the morning I discovered the nurse trying to give her a supershake. I told her she's not drinking them and that's why we put the feeding tube in. So she says... are ya ready for this?? "oh.. well can you get her to drink it because I crushed her medication and put it in there!!"
I wanted to ask what damn planet she's on... but I bit my tongue and said instead "why do you think we inserted the feeding tube?" She won't drink that. And why did you crush her medications because she won't take them crushed either, they are horrible when crushed. It says right on her card to give her the meds ONLY with applesauce and intact, not crushed". She tells me "well I never had her for a patient before". So I remarked.. "then you don't read the instructions on her chart"???
So now she is trying to give her meds in a drink that she won't drink which is the reason for the feeding tube. for crying out loud. Give me a damn break.
Anyway, my mom actually had a good day yesterday even with the insertion of the tube. She was awake most of the day, talking to everyone, etc. Was a really great day.
Then I came in here today at noonish and there she is.. all smiles to see me and eyes wide open... AND NO FEEDING TUBE!! Turns out around 10:30 am she decided she wanted out of bed and she also pulled it out. She told me it was a lie... she didn't do it.. a nurse took it out!! good grief. So I talked to the Dr's again and they are going to put it back in because she really needs the extra protein and the liquid food for the next few days. But.. they are also going to put "mittens" on her. These big puffy mittens that will stop her from pulling on it. While I'm here watching she can have them off but when I'm gone they will have to put them on her in case she tugs at it. hoping that's the one and only time she does that.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
omg.. really???? FTD's means what???
http://o.canada.com/news/toronto-doctor-reveals-secrets-of-hospital-slang
what a disgusting article. Slang words and phrases used by Dr's.
Amongst other things.. Seniors are called FTD's meaning "Failure to Dies".. how disgusting is that? If I ever hear this come out of a Dr's mouth I swear I'll hit them.
what a disgusting article. Slang words and phrases used by Dr's.
Amongst other things.. Seniors are called FTD's meaning "Failure to Dies".. how disgusting is that? If I ever hear this come out of a Dr's mouth I swear I'll hit them.
Wed. August 27/2014
So what do you want to do St. Mike's?? Kill her off because she's old? So she's not eating and she was beginning to swell due to it. What happens is if you don't eat enough your body will leach your proteins. You begin to swell up. I've seen it before with her. She looked like the Michelin man. Was terrible. So she's not eating well, not getting enough food in her and the dietician says we need to put an ng tube in her to feed her maybe tomorrow. So the Dr's say no! So we just let her starve, is that it? She won't take her pills either at times so her blood pressure keeps going up but they won't put her on i.v. meds either. Then don't complain her bp is up.
Her nurse today is Tenzin and she's another gem. Mom has had her before. Poor Tenzin got mom on a bad day, she's pretty delusional and called Tenzin a "bloody bitch" !! I was shocked. She said about 40 minutes after that episode mom apologized to her. Thank goodness. She also told Tenzin that she saw my grandmother and that she's hard of hearing. strange. very strange. I don't like it when people tell me they've seen dead people. Scares the crap out of me. Later my brother calls and he's told she is somewhat confused and is asked if he still wants to talk to her and of course, instead of letting her calm down doesn't he say yes so Tenzin gave her the phone. Next thing I know, whatever the hell he said to her got her all upset and freaking out.
She's yelling for me to come to the hospital.. NOW! I'm trying to find out what is the matter when all of a sudden she tells me "the security guard" (my brother used to be a sheriff) told me my sister Robbie died this morning! Damn.. I have no idea what the hell he said but it triggered something in her and she was so upset that her sister died that morning. It took me quite some time to convince her her sister "Robbie" (both have the same name) passed away 4 years ago almost. Finally she remembered.
She's so confused today. Not much of anything she says makes sense. :-(
Anyway, later in the day I had the above conversation with Dr. Julie. Must find out her last name. Upset me so much I wrote the following letter to Michelle (the dietician who thinks she needs the ng tube) and mom's care manager Vicky:
Well I'm fit to be tied here. At this rate I may as well drop into the funeral home on the way home and tell them to get her paperwork ready. Doesn't matter she isn't eating, they won't put an ng tube in. Says it will make her more delusional. ok so then she'll be a starving nut bar instead of just a nut bar. Oh I beg your pardon, she'll be a fat one too from all the proteins leaching from her system. We've seen that before. Not like it's never happened before to her.
I also asked if they could give her some help because they are complaining she won't take her meds. Turns out she told my brother today the nurses are trying to kill her with the meds. Not funny but really... so I try to give her her meds and today she wouldn't take them from me either although after much cajoling I finally got it in her. I got her next ones in her too thankfully. But it's the stupid bp meds that are given when I'm not here that she sometimes refuses. So I ask if they can't give her them via i.v. for a while until we get her bp settled and stabilized. Well that's a big fat no as well.
So.. we let her starve, and swell up inevitably from lack of food and we don't give her her bp meds via i.v. because.. well I don't know why "because" is. I thought it would give her a foot up. Everything I ask to help her, to gain her strength, to make her better is shot down. So.. we are back to, she's old, she can die. Because that's what I'm getting and I'm getting angry. And my blog is filling up fast. And it's not good either.
Oh.. and we can't put up all 4 railings either because she can put her legs through. Excuse me, but better her leg goes through the rail and I really don't care if it gets stuck there either than to have her hit the floor. So I told Dr. Julie that if she falls out of bed then it's their responsibility. I hope they are willing to take it because if it happens it will come with a lawyer.
And last but not least.. sounds like they are thinking of sending her home very soon too and listen to me.. that's not about to happen until she is more coherent, her bp is stabilized like it used to be before this place messed with her heart meds and removed it causing the shit to hit the fan, and she's not in as much pain in her belly as she's in either. I can deal with her blood count still slowly going up and such but those 3 I can't do at home. And she's not about to go to a nursing home either. With sending her on and off over the last year she doesn't get good care in there. A good example of this is when I broke my foot she stayed 5 days and no one even had the decency to brush the poor old woman's teeth. It's not like she can get up and do it herself. They don't even make sure she drinks her liquid diet either. I'm there 2 and 3 times a damn day. She will be dead in no time if left in that place. And I'll be damned if she's going to lose her family Dr as well. Cripes he's the only one that will listen to her and talk to her and work with her for the betterment of her health. He thinks she's worth something and still contributes to society.
I'll see you tomorrow. I will continue to do my part and try to get her meds into her and feed her even if it means more hours here because I'm not comfortable with watching her swell and get sicker. There is no way on earth you can justify that to me.
So.. that's where I'm leaving this now. I have to get home and I'm worried that she's going to try to get out of bed and fall since they won't allow the 4 rails up. Guess they would rather tie the poor old thing down so she can thrash around and hurt herself and add more bruises to the already dozen she has received while in here.
Her nurse today is Tenzin and she's another gem. Mom has had her before. Poor Tenzin got mom on a bad day, she's pretty delusional and called Tenzin a "bloody bitch" !! I was shocked. She said about 40 minutes after that episode mom apologized to her. Thank goodness. She also told Tenzin that she saw my grandmother and that she's hard of hearing. strange. very strange. I don't like it when people tell me they've seen dead people. Scares the crap out of me. Later my brother calls and he's told she is somewhat confused and is asked if he still wants to talk to her and of course, instead of letting her calm down doesn't he say yes so Tenzin gave her the phone. Next thing I know, whatever the hell he said to her got her all upset and freaking out.
She's yelling for me to come to the hospital.. NOW! I'm trying to find out what is the matter when all of a sudden she tells me "the security guard" (my brother used to be a sheriff) told me my sister Robbie died this morning! Damn.. I have no idea what the hell he said but it triggered something in her and she was so upset that her sister died that morning. It took me quite some time to convince her her sister "Robbie" (both have the same name) passed away 4 years ago almost. Finally she remembered.
She's so confused today. Not much of anything she says makes sense. :-(
Anyway, later in the day I had the above conversation with Dr. Julie. Must find out her last name. Upset me so much I wrote the following letter to Michelle (the dietician who thinks she needs the ng tube) and mom's care manager Vicky:
Well I'm fit to be tied here. At this rate I may as well drop into the funeral home on the way home and tell them to get her paperwork ready. Doesn't matter she isn't eating, they won't put an ng tube in. Says it will make her more delusional. ok so then she'll be a starving nut bar instead of just a nut bar. Oh I beg your pardon, she'll be a fat one too from all the proteins leaching from her system. We've seen that before. Not like it's never happened before to her.
I also asked if they could give her some help because they are complaining she won't take her meds. Turns out she told my brother today the nurses are trying to kill her with the meds. Not funny but really... so I try to give her her meds and today she wouldn't take them from me either although after much cajoling I finally got it in her. I got her next ones in her too thankfully. But it's the stupid bp meds that are given when I'm not here that she sometimes refuses. So I ask if they can't give her them via i.v. for a while until we get her bp settled and stabilized. Well that's a big fat no as well.
So.. we let her starve, and swell up inevitably from lack of food and we don't give her her bp meds via i.v. because.. well I don't know why "because" is. I thought it would give her a foot up. Everything I ask to help her, to gain her strength, to make her better is shot down. So.. we are back to, she's old, she can die. Because that's what I'm getting and I'm getting angry. And my blog is filling up fast. And it's not good either.
Oh.. and we can't put up all 4 railings either because she can put her legs through. Excuse me, but better her leg goes through the rail and I really don't care if it gets stuck there either than to have her hit the floor. So I told Dr. Julie that if she falls out of bed then it's their responsibility. I hope they are willing to take it because if it happens it will come with a lawyer.
And last but not least.. sounds like they are thinking of sending her home very soon too and listen to me.. that's not about to happen until she is more coherent, her bp is stabilized like it used to be before this place messed with her heart meds and removed it causing the shit to hit the fan, and she's not in as much pain in her belly as she's in either. I can deal with her blood count still slowly going up and such but those 3 I can't do at home. And she's not about to go to a nursing home either. With sending her on and off over the last year she doesn't get good care in there. A good example of this is when I broke my foot she stayed 5 days and no one even had the decency to brush the poor old woman's teeth. It's not like she can get up and do it herself. They don't even make sure she drinks her liquid diet either. I'm there 2 and 3 times a damn day. She will be dead in no time if left in that place. And I'll be damned if she's going to lose her family Dr as well. Cripes he's the only one that will listen to her and talk to her and work with her for the betterment of her health. He thinks she's worth something and still contributes to society.
I'll see you tomorrow. I will continue to do my part and try to get her meds into her and feed her even if it means more hours here because I'm not comfortable with watching her swell and get sicker. There is no way on earth you can justify that to me.
So.. that's where I'm leaving this now. I have to get home and I'm worried that she's going to try to get out of bed and fall since they won't allow the 4 rails up. Guess they would rather tie the poor old thing down so she can thrash around and hurt herself and add more bruises to the already dozen she has received while in here.
Tuesday August 26th/2014
Taking it easy this morning. My back is still hurting from yesterday and a friend is going in around 11 am for my mom. Mom's "little Esther" :-) Esther is a sweet young Korean girl who takes my mom to her seniors program every Tuesday. My mom just adores her. Says she is her adopted granddaughter. Loves to hold Esther's hand :-) And Esther is just amazing with her. She goes back to school next week, my mom is going to miss her so much. I'm hoping she will be able to just visit once in a while but with a university schedule I just don't know. It's a lot of work. Esther is going through for something in geriatric's and she should do great.
My mom is so active when at home. Most days she is out at one seniors program or another. Doing social activities with her friends, participating in community events, etc. She looks so small and tired right now. It's difficult to see her like this when she's normally so perky and active. Always wanting to do something or go somewhere. If she's not yakking on the phone she's making plans to finish off the summer going to the Music Garden, back to the Ripley's Aquarium, she wanted to go the the c.n.e. also, going to out of town is yet another thing she wants to do.. and the hairdresser! I think today if she is up to it, I'll take her curling iron and curl her hair some for her. It's not the hairdresser but she feels better and right now she has a Mohawk going on lol. She really needs a haircut but that is going to have to wait.
Hard to believe this month is almost gone already. Sept is around the corner. This week is my biggest week of my seniors program and thankfully I have people that can step in and take over for me while I'm at the hospital. I have a fundraiser coming up as well that I need to start working on. Some of which I can do via email and calls while I'm at the hospital.
When I came in today I said hi to the nurse. Same one as yesterday, the one that doesn't listen. She tells me my mom had a hard time getting her meds in this morning but did it. She gave them with water .. for Christ sake.. what does it take to get a simple Dr's order followed? This place stresses me out and I really don't need any more stress in my life right now thanks.
So.. my mom is sitting here quietly.. talking occasionally, looking a little more like her old self. She's losing weight again though. That much I know because if I don't feed her, no one does. Oh.. excuse me, they give her broth or apple juice.. they give her stuff with no damn calories to provide strength for her. I can't get it across how important it is that she gets the damn super shakes in her. Even one a day for 320 calories but no.. it's easier to give her some damn stupid broth with 0 calories.
OMG.. really? This poor woman in the next bed from my mom. She is a paraplegic and relies on everyone else for help. She has huge bed sores, really deep ones that need to be cleaned and such. She has been buzzing the nurses station for over 20 minutes now asking for help. No one comes. She is crying, she's had a bowel movement and is laying it in with open sores. WTF is the matter with this place? Why is this happening??? I'd change this poor woman myself if I could but with the open bed sores I don't dare touch her. This is SO WRONG. It's torture for her. Finally after more than a 1/2 hour someone came. The nurses had a meeting ... so they don't have anyone on the floor?
Good thing no one had a heart attack or choked on something isn't it? They'd literally be dead before they got back.
Michelle the dietician came in a bit ago. Mom isn't getting enough of her super shake in her so she's getting no calories. I told her that no one is listening here. They give her clear fluids which does nothing for her. She pointed out my mom's feet are starting to swell a bit as well and showed it to her nurse who kind of shrugged. I told Michelle that I don't know why her hands are swelling again and she said it's that old problem back. She is leaching proteins because she is getting no food. If this keeps up we will have to put the tube back up her nose!
EXCUSE ME BUT THIS IS A HOSPITAL AND WHY THE FUCK ISN'T ANYONE MAKING SURE SHE DRINKS HER CALORIES? IT'S NOT OK TO STARVE HER TO THE POINT OF LEACHING THE PROTEINS FROM HER BODY!
Great.. it's now almost 5 pm and she thinks her gums are falling out! What is going on? Is she "sundowning"? Last night this started too. She had an episode like this months ago, like 6 mths back if not more and they thought it was sundowning then but it wasn't. Sundowning doesn't come and go like that. I am going to have to get them to put mittens or something on her because she's picking at her gums and that's not good.
My mom is so active when at home. Most days she is out at one seniors program or another. Doing social activities with her friends, participating in community events, etc. She looks so small and tired right now. It's difficult to see her like this when she's normally so perky and active. Always wanting to do something or go somewhere. If she's not yakking on the phone she's making plans to finish off the summer going to the Music Garden, back to the Ripley's Aquarium, she wanted to go the the c.n.e. also, going to out of town is yet another thing she wants to do.. and the hairdresser! I think today if she is up to it, I'll take her curling iron and curl her hair some for her. It's not the hairdresser but she feels better and right now she has a Mohawk going on lol. She really needs a haircut but that is going to have to wait.
Hard to believe this month is almost gone already. Sept is around the corner. This week is my biggest week of my seniors program and thankfully I have people that can step in and take over for me while I'm at the hospital. I have a fundraiser coming up as well that I need to start working on. Some of which I can do via email and calls while I'm at the hospital.
When I came in today I said hi to the nurse. Same one as yesterday, the one that doesn't listen. She tells me my mom had a hard time getting her meds in this morning but did it. She gave them with water .. for Christ sake.. what does it take to get a simple Dr's order followed? This place stresses me out and I really don't need any more stress in my life right now thanks.
So.. my mom is sitting here quietly.. talking occasionally, looking a little more like her old self. She's losing weight again though. That much I know because if I don't feed her, no one does. Oh.. excuse me, they give her broth or apple juice.. they give her stuff with no damn calories to provide strength for her. I can't get it across how important it is that she gets the damn super shakes in her. Even one a day for 320 calories but no.. it's easier to give her some damn stupid broth with 0 calories.
OMG.. really? This poor woman in the next bed from my mom. She is a paraplegic and relies on everyone else for help. She has huge bed sores, really deep ones that need to be cleaned and such. She has been buzzing the nurses station for over 20 minutes now asking for help. No one comes. She is crying, she's had a bowel movement and is laying it in with open sores. WTF is the matter with this place? Why is this happening??? I'd change this poor woman myself if I could but with the open bed sores I don't dare touch her. This is SO WRONG. It's torture for her. Finally after more than a 1/2 hour someone came. The nurses had a meeting ... so they don't have anyone on the floor?
Good thing no one had a heart attack or choked on something isn't it? They'd literally be dead before they got back.
Michelle the dietician came in a bit ago. Mom isn't getting enough of her super shake in her so she's getting no calories. I told her that no one is listening here. They give her clear fluids which does nothing for her. She pointed out my mom's feet are starting to swell a bit as well and showed it to her nurse who kind of shrugged. I told Michelle that I don't know why her hands are swelling again and she said it's that old problem back. She is leaching proteins because she is getting no food. If this keeps up we will have to put the tube back up her nose!
EXCUSE ME BUT THIS IS A HOSPITAL AND WHY THE FUCK ISN'T ANYONE MAKING SURE SHE DRINKS HER CALORIES? IT'S NOT OK TO STARVE HER TO THE POINT OF LEACHING THE PROTEINS FROM HER BODY!
Great.. it's now almost 5 pm and she thinks her gums are falling out! What is going on? Is she "sundowning"? Last night this started too. She had an episode like this months ago, like 6 mths back if not more and they thought it was sundowning then but it wasn't. Sundowning doesn't come and go like that. I am going to have to get them to put mittens or something on her because she's picking at her gums and that's not good.
Monday, August 25, 2014
Monday August 25th/2014
WOW... it's 10:00 am and I thought I'd try phoning my mom and didn't she pick up her own phone and talk to me a bit!!! Sounded like I woke her up but hey.. this is great!!!!
hmm updating here.. got to the hospital around 12:45 pm to find her pretty sluggish again. I'm trying to be positive though on her behalf with the fact she answered her own phone this morning after several rings. And talked to me a bit too.
Nurse is trying to get her to take her pills. She is on fluids again i.v. for some reason, damned if I know, they tell me nothing unless I hunt them down and seek answers and depending on which Dr I get, at times I just get the feeling of condescension and that I'm wasting their precious time. Well time with my mom is precious too Bubba. I am so so tired of the "she's old" routine. We are suppose to accept this statement as a fact that it makes her unworthy of trying harder for her, that it makes her unnecessary to society, that we should just let her die and get it over will. Bullshit. She's a champion, a fighter, and she doesn't want to go yet.
I'm still rather annoyed at the i.c.u. Dr that will not follow her wishes. She wants to be resuscitated, she knows she can fight back if given a good chance. He on the other hand gives me this : Well, if she was a cancer patient and wanted chemo but we thought chemo was not going to work for her, we wouldn't give it". There was another example he used too however... just because he doesn't think she's worth saving doesn't mean she isn't. He had absolutely no reason to disrespect her wishes. I had this conversation with her just a couple of weeks back. After every time she has a hard time and ends up in hospital, we have this conversation. I want to make sure I'm doing exactly what she wants. If she wants heroic measures then it's his job to do that. He is really rather crude. Tells me.. "do you really want us to crush her chest and break her ribs, etc.". It's overkill and unnecessary. I know what happens and I also know they have paddles they can use to shock her heart back that they can have at the ready. I've already put her on a ventilator once and she thanked me for it when she got off it.
She says she doesn't want to die because she isn't ready. When she is she will let go. Just like her mom did before her. According to this Dr. no one ever says they want to die. Really? You just ask any nurse, they will tell you patients say that all the time. My grandmother (her mother) did exactly that. The next time I saw him he got really angry at me for asking her if she wanted to die. The final time I saw him he stood at the foot of her bed, very sullen.. telling me they've done everything that is not invasive. Invasive??? At this point he really didn't even know she had had the aneurysm. He didn't have any answers to what happened last Monday but he's certainly very opinionated as to what he believes the end results should be.
We are very up front with each other, my mom and I, and I'll do anything she asks or wants. He on the other hand seems to think I know nothing. He knows best and he knows what she wants. The bullshit is getting so deep around here that I'm going to need hip waders soon.
Well hell... the fire alarm is going off in here. Now what?
No idea what that was about but was some time before they announced the all clear. I decided to go to the Senator Restaurant go grab my lunch when the alarm went off. Since we couldn't use the elevators or anything until the all clear came, by the time I got to the Senator for my club house on challah the damn restaurant was in the process of closing for the day. They close at 2:30 on Mondays and it was now 2:45 :-( had to go to the stupid cafeteria here and eat fried food. ugh.. either that or Timmies which I can't stand either. You cannot get a decent, healthy meal in this hospital anywhere. Timmies, Second Cup and everything fried at the cafeteria. They stop serving anything hot in this place by 2 pm and there are slim pickings for anything good after that and even the hot meals here are bad.
It's later now.. I'm so tired that I lost my balance and thankfully hit the chair on the way down and not the floor. Hurt my back some though. Things started changing around 6 pm for my mom. She started getting agitated and confused. I had a talk with her nurse but she seems not all that concerned that my mom may fall out of bed! So.. before I left for the night, I wrote the following email to my mom's care manager who is remarkable at her job ...
Not too long after you left my mom started getting a bit agitated. Then she started getting a bit delusional. At 6:30 she got really agitated and started telling me she had to get off the bed! She was almost yelling at me that she had to get off the bed! She then started making no sense telling me her waist was getting too tight.
I told her nurse (Katrina) and she said she may have to give her something. Now.. when I asked one time when they actually put soft restraints on her in the emerg if they could give her something to calm her down instead I was told no because it can make the delusions even worse since those things work on the brain. Katrina also said she would tell the evening nurse.
I wanted to go home early tonight however the situation is getting worse, not better. By 7 pm she was still complaining loudly about her waist being tight and something about putting her legs on! I took the sheets off her and that calmed her a bit but then it started right back up. Katrina was called into the room by the lady in the next bed to move her position so while she was in here I asked if she could please move my mom too and maybe that would calm her.
I got a loud sigh. Really? Listen.. I have to go home at some point. Being exhausted isn't helping my health and I'm sorry but I can't sit here 24/7 and watch my mom. This place won't give her a sitter so it's up to the nurse. She did come over with a c.a. and move my mom and right now she's calmed down.
We had yet another conversation though.. This girl is just a contradiction to whatever I say or have been told by a Dr or another nurse. It was her that told me I can't cut the pills smaller yet another nurse has crushed them and a Dr ok'd me cutting them up small to get it into her. Now we are arguing about restraints and I really don't like people pretty much rolling their eyes at me either.
I told her when I leave I will put up the 2 bottom rails. I told her I know it's considered a restraint but previously as her p.o.a. as long as I gave my permission when she's like this that they can be used. She pretty much rolls her eyes and says "that's a restraint". I said "that's what I just said but as her p.o.a. as long as I give permission it's ok.".. she says as she rolls her eyes "I've never heard that". So now we are debating the stupid rails. I told her I would much prefer to put up the rails then have the soft restraints used which only agitate her more and I don't believe in tying people up if there is another way. She'll just thrash and possibly hurt herself. She changes her stance and says that the only time all the rails can be put up is if the Dr orders it and no Dr is going to order it. For Christ sake.. enough already. Put the damn rails up instead of strapping her to the bed. Or get her a sitter.
Then the lady in the next bed called her again, I believe she needed her bladder emptied and doesn't Katrina say "they'll do it later, I'm almost off shift". It's only about 7:05 pm. don't make that lady suffer. Not like she has a foley in, she needs and in & out done. She's defenceless. Katrina grumbles and then goes and helps her thank goodness. I don't know what that girls problem is but she has an attitude that needs to be put into check. I'm here all damn day and basically do her job for her so it's not like my mom is demanding. Today we actually used the call bell for once because she needed ondansetron and I couldn't find the nurse. Turns out she was on her break. Normally I just go and ask and wait until the nurse has some time. No more when she's on shift. I'll just keep buzzing if my mom needs anything and let her actually take care of my mom too. She can give her every pill, every drink, etc. And if she doesn't get drinks and she starts to dehydrate then it can be Katrina's fault. I'm tired of this. My mom could be a lot harder to take care of
So it's now 7:20 pm and I'm not gone yet. I'm dead on my feet but am afraid to leave. Looks like I'm blogging again tonight.
hmm updating here.. got to the hospital around 12:45 pm to find her pretty sluggish again. I'm trying to be positive though on her behalf with the fact she answered her own phone this morning after several rings. And talked to me a bit too.
Nurse is trying to get her to take her pills. She is on fluids again i.v. for some reason, damned if I know, they tell me nothing unless I hunt them down and seek answers and depending on which Dr I get, at times I just get the feeling of condescension and that I'm wasting their precious time. Well time with my mom is precious too Bubba. I am so so tired of the "she's old" routine. We are suppose to accept this statement as a fact that it makes her unworthy of trying harder for her, that it makes her unnecessary to society, that we should just let her die and get it over will. Bullshit. She's a champion, a fighter, and she doesn't want to go yet.
I'm still rather annoyed at the i.c.u. Dr that will not follow her wishes. She wants to be resuscitated, she knows she can fight back if given a good chance. He on the other hand gives me this : Well, if she was a cancer patient and wanted chemo but we thought chemo was not going to work for her, we wouldn't give it". There was another example he used too however... just because he doesn't think she's worth saving doesn't mean she isn't. He had absolutely no reason to disrespect her wishes. I had this conversation with her just a couple of weeks back. After every time she has a hard time and ends up in hospital, we have this conversation. I want to make sure I'm doing exactly what she wants. If she wants heroic measures then it's his job to do that. He is really rather crude. Tells me.. "do you really want us to crush her chest and break her ribs, etc.". It's overkill and unnecessary. I know what happens and I also know they have paddles they can use to shock her heart back that they can have at the ready. I've already put her on a ventilator once and she thanked me for it when she got off it.
She says she doesn't want to die because she isn't ready. When she is she will let go. Just like her mom did before her. According to this Dr. no one ever says they want to die. Really? You just ask any nurse, they will tell you patients say that all the time. My grandmother (her mother) did exactly that. The next time I saw him he got really angry at me for asking her if she wanted to die. The final time I saw him he stood at the foot of her bed, very sullen.. telling me they've done everything that is not invasive. Invasive??? At this point he really didn't even know she had had the aneurysm. He didn't have any answers to what happened last Monday but he's certainly very opinionated as to what he believes the end results should be.
We are very up front with each other, my mom and I, and I'll do anything she asks or wants. He on the other hand seems to think I know nothing. He knows best and he knows what she wants. The bullshit is getting so deep around here that I'm going to need hip waders soon.
Well hell... the fire alarm is going off in here. Now what?
No idea what that was about but was some time before they announced the all clear. I decided to go to the Senator Restaurant go grab my lunch when the alarm went off. Since we couldn't use the elevators or anything until the all clear came, by the time I got to the Senator for my club house on challah the damn restaurant was in the process of closing for the day. They close at 2:30 on Mondays and it was now 2:45 :-( had to go to the stupid cafeteria here and eat fried food. ugh.. either that or Timmies which I can't stand either. You cannot get a decent, healthy meal in this hospital anywhere. Timmies, Second Cup and everything fried at the cafeteria. They stop serving anything hot in this place by 2 pm and there are slim pickings for anything good after that and even the hot meals here are bad.
It's later now.. I'm so tired that I lost my balance and thankfully hit the chair on the way down and not the floor. Hurt my back some though. Things started changing around 6 pm for my mom. She started getting agitated and confused. I had a talk with her nurse but she seems not all that concerned that my mom may fall out of bed! So.. before I left for the night, I wrote the following email to my mom's care manager who is remarkable at her job ...
Not too long after you left my mom started getting a bit agitated. Then she started getting a bit delusional. At 6:30 she got really agitated and started telling me she had to get off the bed! She was almost yelling at me that she had to get off the bed! She then started making no sense telling me her waist was getting too tight.
I told her nurse (Katrina) and she said she may have to give her something. Now.. when I asked one time when they actually put soft restraints on her in the emerg if they could give her something to calm her down instead I was told no because it can make the delusions even worse since those things work on the brain. Katrina also said she would tell the evening nurse.
I wanted to go home early tonight however the situation is getting worse, not better. By 7 pm she was still complaining loudly about her waist being tight and something about putting her legs on! I took the sheets off her and that calmed her a bit but then it started right back up. Katrina was called into the room by the lady in the next bed to move her position so while she was in here I asked if she could please move my mom too and maybe that would calm her.
I got a loud sigh. Really? Listen.. I have to go home at some point. Being exhausted isn't helping my health and I'm sorry but I can't sit here 24/7 and watch my mom. This place won't give her a sitter so it's up to the nurse. She did come over with a c.a. and move my mom and right now she's calmed down.
We had yet another conversation though.. This girl is just a contradiction to whatever I say or have been told by a Dr or another nurse. It was her that told me I can't cut the pills smaller yet another nurse has crushed them and a Dr ok'd me cutting them up small to get it into her. Now we are arguing about restraints and I really don't like people pretty much rolling their eyes at me either.
I told her when I leave I will put up the 2 bottom rails. I told her I know it's considered a restraint but previously as her p.o.a. as long as I gave my permission when she's like this that they can be used. She pretty much rolls her eyes and says "that's a restraint". I said "that's what I just said but as her p.o.a. as long as I give permission it's ok.".. she says as she rolls her eyes "I've never heard that". So now we are debating the stupid rails. I told her I would much prefer to put up the rails then have the soft restraints used which only agitate her more and I don't believe in tying people up if there is another way. She'll just thrash and possibly hurt herself. She changes her stance and says that the only time all the rails can be put up is if the Dr orders it and no Dr is going to order it. For Christ sake.. enough already. Put the damn rails up instead of strapping her to the bed. Or get her a sitter.
Then the lady in the next bed called her again, I believe she needed her bladder emptied and doesn't Katrina say "they'll do it later, I'm almost off shift". It's only about 7:05 pm. don't make that lady suffer. Not like she has a foley in, she needs and in & out done. She's defenceless. Katrina grumbles and then goes and helps her thank goodness. I don't know what that girls problem is but she has an attitude that needs to be put into check. I'm here all damn day and basically do her job for her so it's not like my mom is demanding. Today we actually used the call bell for once because she needed ondansetron and I couldn't find the nurse. Turns out she was on her break. Normally I just go and ask and wait until the nurse has some time. No more when she's on shift. I'll just keep buzzing if my mom needs anything and let her actually take care of my mom too. She can give her every pill, every drink, etc. And if she doesn't get drinks and she starts to dehydrate then it can be Katrina's fault. I'm tired of this. My mom could be a lot harder to take care of
So it's now 7:20 pm and I'm not gone yet. I'm dead on my feet but am afraid to leave. Looks like I'm blogging again tonight.
Sunday, August 24, 2014
Sunday August 24th/2014
Didn't get much sleep last night but the guy from the repair place called at 7:30 to let me know he was on his way. He showed up close to 8:30 and had the flat fixed by 8:45. Wonderful, that's one lot of stress relieved.
Got to the hospital and Aileen, mom's nurse, was relieved to see me. I asked what was up and she said mom wouldn't take her meds again. Turns out she crushed them and put a huge lot of them in a little tub of applesauce. Stupid... I keep telling them not to crush the damn pills. They taste like shit and she won't take them but of course, some people know best. If it wasn't for the fact that mom really needs those medications (her bp meds and pain meds) I'd tell her tough shit. You were told not to crush them. But.. I wouldn't do that to mom.
I went into her room and she woke up and smiled!!! So much better than yesterday so far. She took the meds for me with a sour face and lots of complaint, lots of water and even coffee but I just kept asking her to take them because they were so important. She's been awake and talking to me off and on. She doesn't look so withdrawn either. And her pain seems to be reduced somewhat. She's not getting that horrific cramping type pain so often in her tummy from the blood. Damn that is a slow process for the body to take care of blood in the belly.
I got here at 11:15 am, a bit later than usual but I'm so tired I'm having great difficulty waking up in the mornings these days and didn't get much sleep last night at all. Even our dogs seemed upset last night. Ligia started barking like mad at me and she normally only barks when someone is at the door. The puppies were running back and forth like crazy too. I know they miss her. I find them in her room a lot looking up at her bed :-(
Since getting here I have yet to see her Dr. I have to leave at around 4:30 pm to go home and let the dogs out for a while since my friend Ravinder who is taking care of them for us has gone out for the day for an opportunity to see her sister who is in town for a visit. I will go home and let them out, maybe have a little nap, then come back for a while too. Then head home for the night around 8:30 or 9 pm. Another long day.
Back by 6:30 pm and she's still snoozing but did wake up and took a drink of water. As I sit here I notice that a pill from earlier today still isn't down her. It's potassium and it's a freakin huge pill. So they crushed it. It's still sitting here in one of those little medicine cups and it almost 1/2 fills it! Another time when she was on this damn thing I literally had to bring my pill cutter from home and cut that damn thing into 20 pieces! Yes... no kidding, 20 pieces so she could take it. I was asked to give this to her but forgot but I know she won't take it like that. It's bitter and tastes terrible.
If a patient can't take their own medications in here they are so screwed. So many times I've had my mom so sick she's almost unconscious yet they bring the little medicine cup of pills and say "here are your pills" and then put them on the bed table. Expecting them to take them themselves. My mom needs her medications with applesauce and has difficulty holding spoons.. good luck to her. And they wonder why people don't get better? stupid.
Got to the hospital and Aileen, mom's nurse, was relieved to see me. I asked what was up and she said mom wouldn't take her meds again. Turns out she crushed them and put a huge lot of them in a little tub of applesauce. Stupid... I keep telling them not to crush the damn pills. They taste like shit and she won't take them but of course, some people know best. If it wasn't for the fact that mom really needs those medications (her bp meds and pain meds) I'd tell her tough shit. You were told not to crush them. But.. I wouldn't do that to mom.
I went into her room and she woke up and smiled!!! So much better than yesterday so far. She took the meds for me with a sour face and lots of complaint, lots of water and even coffee but I just kept asking her to take them because they were so important. She's been awake and talking to me off and on. She doesn't look so withdrawn either. And her pain seems to be reduced somewhat. She's not getting that horrific cramping type pain so often in her tummy from the blood. Damn that is a slow process for the body to take care of blood in the belly.
I got here at 11:15 am, a bit later than usual but I'm so tired I'm having great difficulty waking up in the mornings these days and didn't get much sleep last night at all. Even our dogs seemed upset last night. Ligia started barking like mad at me and she normally only barks when someone is at the door. The puppies were running back and forth like crazy too. I know they miss her. I find them in her room a lot looking up at her bed :-(
Since getting here I have yet to see her Dr. I have to leave at around 4:30 pm to go home and let the dogs out for a while since my friend Ravinder who is taking care of them for us has gone out for the day for an opportunity to see her sister who is in town for a visit. I will go home and let them out, maybe have a little nap, then come back for a while too. Then head home for the night around 8:30 or 9 pm. Another long day.
Back by 6:30 pm and she's still snoozing but did wake up and took a drink of water. As I sit here I notice that a pill from earlier today still isn't down her. It's potassium and it's a freakin huge pill. So they crushed it. It's still sitting here in one of those little medicine cups and it almost 1/2 fills it! Another time when she was on this damn thing I literally had to bring my pill cutter from home and cut that damn thing into 20 pieces! Yes... no kidding, 20 pieces so she could take it. I was asked to give this to her but forgot but I know she won't take it like that. It's bitter and tastes terrible.
If a patient can't take their own medications in here they are so screwed. So many times I've had my mom so sick she's almost unconscious yet they bring the little medicine cup of pills and say "here are your pills" and then put them on the bed table. Expecting them to take them themselves. My mom needs her medications with applesauce and has difficulty holding spoons.. good luck to her. And they wonder why people don't get better? stupid.
Saturday August 23rd, 2014
I'm getting increasingly tired. Odd.. must be the stress. I leave the hospital around 9 pm, get to bed around 10:30, fall asleep around 11:30 and up about 8:30 which is normally late for me. I'm up and down most the night but am still getting sleep. Must be the stress as to why I'm feeling so damn tired. It gets more difficult typing all this too. It's a lot. Makes me more tired at times.
My mom is in a room with a younger woman who constantly is calling the nurse. She also has a tv that is relatively loud. If mom had a tv it would probably drown it out. Occasionally I look at yahoo news or cp24 but unless I turn up the speakers on this thing I don't hear anything. They should tell her to use earphones instead. If I'm not mistaken you get a pair when you order the tv. Maybe I'm just grumpy because I'm tired but it does wake my mom now and then.
I'm exhausted and it's been a bad day today. Went to the hospital this morning to find out my mom's blood pressure is fast on the rise again. 190/130 They put a nitro patch on her again to help bring it down. Not sure what the hell is doing it other than meds, stress and pain she's under right now. So she was pretty quiet most of the day and then she slept deeply for a couple of hours before I left. At that point she got a bit scary, would barely wake up but did enough to take some meds for me. But then started wailing like something was wrong but she wouldn't talk. That stopped (I think it was bad gas and with her tummy problems it made it a lot worse), but she still wouldn't talk to me, like she couldn't. Finally.. finally.. she said a few small things to me and I was able to go home feeling a bit better. She gave me kisses goodnight and told me she loved me. And she smiled. but......
on my way home, there is an apt building that is having some work done so the construction built a cover over the sidewalk to protect the people walking BUT they didn't hang lights from it so while I was going through it it was dark. It was 9:30 so there were lots of shadows under it and suddenly there was a smashed beer bottle right in front of me and I couldn't stop my scooter fast enough.
I went over it and blew one of the back tires of my scooter. I'm unable to walk very far and now it's dark out, I'm in a shitty part of town and am alone, on the phone to my nephew telling him how his nanna is... now I'm standing there crying not knowing how I'm going to get home. Worried about my mom, worried about how I get home, worried about how to fix the flat on the weekend.
A young couple came up to me and offered whatever help they could give me. I called a friend Jimmy and he got dressed and brought his disabled van cab to pick me up. While waiting for him I just lost it, too much today, this week I guess and this nice young lady asked me if she could give me a hug. I said yes and bawled on her shoulder. She asked mom's name and I told her and she asked if she could pray for my mom and I said yes, of course, thanks. And then she asked me if they could give me taxi money or something to help me get home. Even wondered if my scooter would fit in her boyfriends home for me until I could figure something out. While waiting for Jimmy the young man went and removed the beer bottle from the sidewalk and through the rest of it away.
Jimmy came and before I left I gave her my business card. I sincerely hope she calls me at some point, I'd like to take them to dinner at least. They were so kind and thoughtful not to leave me alone in that area and to offer whatever help they possibly could to a stranger in need. There aren't many of those types around these days but I'm certainly happy I found two of them tonight.
Jimmy got me home safely and pushed my scooter upstairs for me and the company I use for my scooter repairs has a 24 hr hotline and the guy will be here around 8 am to fix the flat. Hoping mom is ok tonight and gets a good nights sleep and I'll see her in the morning like I promised her when I left.
My mom is in a room with a younger woman who constantly is calling the nurse. She also has a tv that is relatively loud. If mom had a tv it would probably drown it out. Occasionally I look at yahoo news or cp24 but unless I turn up the speakers on this thing I don't hear anything. They should tell her to use earphones instead. If I'm not mistaken you get a pair when you order the tv. Maybe I'm just grumpy because I'm tired but it does wake my mom now and then.
I'm exhausted and it's been a bad day today. Went to the hospital this morning to find out my mom's blood pressure is fast on the rise again. 190/130 They put a nitro patch on her again to help bring it down. Not sure what the hell is doing it other than meds, stress and pain she's under right now. So she was pretty quiet most of the day and then she slept deeply for a couple of hours before I left. At that point she got a bit scary, would barely wake up but did enough to take some meds for me. But then started wailing like something was wrong but she wouldn't talk. That stopped (I think it was bad gas and with her tummy problems it made it a lot worse), but she still wouldn't talk to me, like she couldn't. Finally.. finally.. she said a few small things to me and I was able to go home feeling a bit better. She gave me kisses goodnight and told me she loved me. And she smiled. but......
on my way home, there is an apt building that is having some work done so the construction built a cover over the sidewalk to protect the people walking BUT they didn't hang lights from it so while I was going through it it was dark. It was 9:30 so there were lots of shadows under it and suddenly there was a smashed beer bottle right in front of me and I couldn't stop my scooter fast enough.
I went over it and blew one of the back tires of my scooter. I'm unable to walk very far and now it's dark out, I'm in a shitty part of town and am alone, on the phone to my nephew telling him how his nanna is... now I'm standing there crying not knowing how I'm going to get home. Worried about my mom, worried about how I get home, worried about how to fix the flat on the weekend.
A young couple came up to me and offered whatever help they could give me. I called a friend Jimmy and he got dressed and brought his disabled van cab to pick me up. While waiting for him I just lost it, too much today, this week I guess and this nice young lady asked me if she could give me a hug. I said yes and bawled on her shoulder. She asked mom's name and I told her and she asked if she could pray for my mom and I said yes, of course, thanks. And then she asked me if they could give me taxi money or something to help me get home. Even wondered if my scooter would fit in her boyfriends home for me until I could figure something out. While waiting for Jimmy the young man went and removed the beer bottle from the sidewalk and through the rest of it away.
Jimmy came and before I left I gave her my business card. I sincerely hope she calls me at some point, I'd like to take them to dinner at least. They were so kind and thoughtful not to leave me alone in that area and to offer whatever help they possibly could to a stranger in need. There aren't many of those types around these days but I'm certainly happy I found two of them tonight.
Jimmy got me home safely and pushed my scooter upstairs for me and the company I use for my scooter repairs has a 24 hr hotline and the guy will be here around 8 am to fix the flat. Hoping mom is ok tonight and gets a good nights sleep and I'll see her in the morning like I promised her when I left.
Saturday, August 23, 2014
More about Friday August 22nd/2014
By midday mom was getting very quiet. Too much hydromorphone as far as I'm concerned. She is still in a lot of pain too. Now her blood pressure is starting to rise a bit again as well. Nothing I want to see that's for sure. Good news is her blood is clotting well and holding the leak so her blood levels are going up on their own as they need to. As well, her I.N.R.'s are ok too.
Michelle (the dietician) went looking for her Dr to have him/her talk to me. Never know who it is. Turns out it's Peter who looks all of 18. I swear. They are either getting younger or I'm getting a lot older. Anyway, around 6:30 Peter finally makes his presence known and what started as a simple conversation about my mom's pain levels got way off track when he knew better and started getting condescending with me. This is a bit of how it went:
He looks at her passed out due to the hydromorphone and states “well she looks comfortable and pain free”. Really? I wake her up, she’s in a stupor, and he asks if she’s in pain and she says yes. He asks her where.. she says her back and stomach are in awful pain. He asks her to put a number to it and she says 10. Then the poor thing passes out again from the hydromorphone and he says again “she looks comfortable and pain free”. When I try to talk to him about the fact she’s getting more delusional on all this hydromorphone I get this condescending look and am given a dissertation about how it’s normal for elderly… bull… it’s not the norm for her, it only happens when she having an infection or when she’s loaded up on hydromophone. Clear up the infection and she’s spot on again. Can pass any test you give her. Can go to her family Dr and discuss her health with him and answer all his questions without any help from me.
so please......... do not think that seniors are without worth and just because they are old it's ok if they die now instead of later. asshole. I left this night with no answers from little Peter. Only his attitude which I really don't want or need. Letter time.
Also talked to my family Dr. for a bit. He called me around 6 pm Friday to see how my mom was doing. I told him what was going on and he sounded very sad. He's known my mom for many years and she adores him. I actually think he enjoys it when she comes for a check up. She's remarkable and he makes no bones about saying so. He was asking me if they will let her go home or send her directly to a nursing home. I told him I have a lot of issues with that. The new one that she goes to is not attentive to their patients. They only give her a mat to land on AFTER she falls. No one ever brushes the poor woman's teeth. They leave her to linger in her bed all weekend instead of taking her to activities that she wants to participate in. They don't even dress her until noon for crying out loud so she gets a bit mixed up since she's in her pj's all day. You can't do that to these people. She goes every now and then for a weekend so I can get a break but it's never a real break. I'm there, at least twice a day to check on things and make sure she has what she needs. They don't even take her to the cafeteria at meal time. They just take her her liquid diet and leave her in her room. At least let her socialize a bit.
It's not a good place to be at all and it's no wonder, having the experiences we have had there, that these old folks roll over and die before their time. If you are ambulatory or can do things yourself still, you are ok in there but once you need real care.. you'll not get it. I've actually started to blog a bit about this as well in a blog called "Diary of a Mad Caregiver".
Michelle (the dietician) went looking for her Dr to have him/her talk to me. Never know who it is. Turns out it's Peter who looks all of 18. I swear. They are either getting younger or I'm getting a lot older. Anyway, around 6:30 Peter finally makes his presence known and what started as a simple conversation about my mom's pain levels got way off track when he knew better and started getting condescending with me. This is a bit of how it went:
He looks at her passed out due to the hydromorphone and states “well she looks comfortable and pain free”. Really? I wake her up, she’s in a stupor, and he asks if she’s in pain and she says yes. He asks her where.. she says her back and stomach are in awful pain. He asks her to put a number to it and she says 10. Then the poor thing passes out again from the hydromorphone and he says again “she looks comfortable and pain free”. When I try to talk to him about the fact she’s getting more delusional on all this hydromorphone I get this condescending look and am given a dissertation about how it’s normal for elderly… bull… it’s not the norm for her, it only happens when she having an infection or when she’s loaded up on hydromophone. Clear up the infection and she’s spot on again. Can pass any test you give her. Can go to her family Dr and discuss her health with him and answer all his questions without any help from me.
so please......... do not think that seniors are without worth and just because they are old it's ok if they die now instead of later. asshole. I left this night with no answers from little Peter. Only his attitude which I really don't want or need. Letter time.
Also talked to my family Dr. for a bit. He called me around 6 pm Friday to see how my mom was doing. I told him what was going on and he sounded very sad. He's known my mom for many years and she adores him. I actually think he enjoys it when she comes for a check up. She's remarkable and he makes no bones about saying so. He was asking me if they will let her go home or send her directly to a nursing home. I told him I have a lot of issues with that. The new one that she goes to is not attentive to their patients. They only give her a mat to land on AFTER she falls. No one ever brushes the poor woman's teeth. They leave her to linger in her bed all weekend instead of taking her to activities that she wants to participate in. They don't even dress her until noon for crying out loud so she gets a bit mixed up since she's in her pj's all day. You can't do that to these people. She goes every now and then for a weekend so I can get a break but it's never a real break. I'm there, at least twice a day to check on things and make sure she has what she needs. They don't even take her to the cafeteria at meal time. They just take her her liquid diet and leave her in her room. At least let her socialize a bit.
It's not a good place to be at all and it's no wonder, having the experiences we have had there, that these old folks roll over and die before their time. If you are ambulatory or can do things yourself still, you are ok in there but once you need real care.. you'll not get it. I've actually started to blog a bit about this as well in a blog called "Diary of a Mad Caregiver".
Friday, August 22, 2014
Friday August 22/2014
Got here a little late today. Around 12:30 pm. Had to run to the pharmacy for myself and pick up my prescriptions because they aren't open on the weekend. Also posted the flyers for my seniors group, got the laundry ready for my homemaker and priced the produce for the seniors program so tomorrow I can put in the order. I need to do other things and it helps keep my mind occupied on something else briefly. Also met Susan to give her the money for the food she's cooking for my seniors too next week. Got a lot of things done in the morning and played with the dogs too for a bit who are desperately missing my mom. I keep catching Six sitting at the side of my mom's bed looking up at it searching for her. Ligia is sleeping under her bed all night, every night. SoCute is lost without her and so is Bubba. Poor things are lonely when I'm gone all day and they can't find Nanna. Our good friend Ravinder is going in and out all the time to be with them and to feed them at night if I'm unable to make it on time. Thank goodness for her. I don't know what we would do without her. She will also take over my seniors program next week as well for the most part.
I called earlier today around 10 am to speak to my mom's nurse but they said she was busy. I heard nothing from Lilibeth during the night so I am pretty sure all went ok. They know they can call any time. When I got here her nurse was helping the lady in the next bed and my mom was in a lot of pain. I reminded her she had some blood in her tummy and that was the cause of the pain but all she wants is for it to go away. I asked her if she took her pills this morning and the nurse piped in and said yes. Whew... mornings aren't good with her and she hasn't done that until now.
When the nurse was finished I asked her if she could have something for pain and she told me she already had her codeine. I asked what time and she was talking about the morning one. I told her she could have hydromorphone as breakthrough. Seems she didn't know that!!! Then she tried to put my mom on her other side and my mom fought against it. It's really painful for my mom to lay on that side due to a serious curve in her spine. Seems the nurse didn't know this information either. When I told her she would just move back and why, she said "oh, that's good to know, I didn't know that". for crying out loud, didn't she read her chart at all???
So... so far today it's proving interesting again. I wish she had of got a nurse she knows. I'm actually pretty sure she's had this one before but she has an attitude like she couldn't care less. I'm hoping this isn't going to be a long day with the nurse.
I also asked the nurse if my mom's Dr had seen her yet and the reply I got was this: "I don't know, I don't know anything. I don't get to know the Dr's here because in no time they are gone." (Dr's here go on rotation, it's a learning hospital - albeit it's usually at the expense of the patients). So, so much for asking that.
I actually made myself a sandwich to bring with me today. Don't think I could eat any more yukky fries or overcooked chicken fingers from here any more. The hamburgers would probably kill someone if you threw it at them. I'll go downstairs soon and try to get some vegetarian Asian noodles, they were good.
On the way to the fridge I actually had the luck to run into one of the Dr's on her team. He told me Peter was her Dr today but I've yet to see him. He was kind enough to give me some information though. Her blood tests came up ok this morning so no transfusions yet. The tummy pain will be around for a few days at least and it just has to take care of itself. Her bp is ok as well. Pleasant young man, always helpful. More than I can say for some of them.
I had a complaint the other day when talking to Vicky. Vicky When is her case manager. She has been my mom's case manager pretty much every time she's been in here. She's amazing at her job. I was talking to her last night before she left because I was having some issues with her care and I was telling her that the majority of the Dr's in this place need a course on bedside manner. They see an elderly person and it's almost like they are disposable. I get a lot of "well you know, she's old".. really? And is this how you want someone to think of you when you're older and have a health issue? It's like they think they are not productive parts of society any more so they should just let them go and not do anything really to save their lives. This is bullshit. As the owner/operator of a non-profit for seniors I can tell you I have 90 year olds that are actively involved in their community and families and such. I wonder if this is how they feel about their grandparents?
Oddly enough she is having hallucinations again. They had cleared up when the infection got under control. She told me there was a pigeon walking around this morning. Then she said it was in the livingroom. I reminded her she was in the hospital. So.. with that said, I'm not sure if it's an hallucination or a dream because about a month ago a damn pigeon flew into our apt and landed on the windowsill in our livingroom. Dream about an event that happened... or hallucination? She just woke up again and told me "I didn't put anything in there". Not sure what the hell that was about but she pretty much repeated it word for word then fell back asleep.
Damn.. it is so noisy in here. Enough to wake the dead. She's near the nurses station and man they yak it up out there. And it's not medical business either. It's personal stuff, joking around, laughing very loudly, yelling across the place to each other. I guess they don't know this is a hospital and should be a quiet zone. I remember once when I was on cardiology I was near the nurses station, got very little sleep due to the noise and every time I got up and closed my door, I'd just get to seep and they would re-opened it.
I called earlier today around 10 am to speak to my mom's nurse but they said she was busy. I heard nothing from Lilibeth during the night so I am pretty sure all went ok. They know they can call any time. When I got here her nurse was helping the lady in the next bed and my mom was in a lot of pain. I reminded her she had some blood in her tummy and that was the cause of the pain but all she wants is for it to go away. I asked her if she took her pills this morning and the nurse piped in and said yes. Whew... mornings aren't good with her and she hasn't done that until now.
When the nurse was finished I asked her if she could have something for pain and she told me she already had her codeine. I asked what time and she was talking about the morning one. I told her she could have hydromorphone as breakthrough. Seems she didn't know that!!! Then she tried to put my mom on her other side and my mom fought against it. It's really painful for my mom to lay on that side due to a serious curve in her spine. Seems the nurse didn't know this information either. When I told her she would just move back and why, she said "oh, that's good to know, I didn't know that". for crying out loud, didn't she read her chart at all???
So... so far today it's proving interesting again. I wish she had of got a nurse she knows. I'm actually pretty sure she's had this one before but she has an attitude like she couldn't care less. I'm hoping this isn't going to be a long day with the nurse.
I also asked the nurse if my mom's Dr had seen her yet and the reply I got was this: "I don't know, I don't know anything. I don't get to know the Dr's here because in no time they are gone." (Dr's here go on rotation, it's a learning hospital - albeit it's usually at the expense of the patients). So, so much for asking that.
I actually made myself a sandwich to bring with me today. Don't think I could eat any more yukky fries or overcooked chicken fingers from here any more. The hamburgers would probably kill someone if you threw it at them. I'll go downstairs soon and try to get some vegetarian Asian noodles, they were good.
On the way to the fridge I actually had the luck to run into one of the Dr's on her team. He told me Peter was her Dr today but I've yet to see him. He was kind enough to give me some information though. Her blood tests came up ok this morning so no transfusions yet. The tummy pain will be around for a few days at least and it just has to take care of itself. Her bp is ok as well. Pleasant young man, always helpful. More than I can say for some of them.
I had a complaint the other day when talking to Vicky. Vicky When is her case manager. She has been my mom's case manager pretty much every time she's been in here. She's amazing at her job. I was talking to her last night before she left because I was having some issues with her care and I was telling her that the majority of the Dr's in this place need a course on bedside manner. They see an elderly person and it's almost like they are disposable. I get a lot of "well you know, she's old".. really? And is this how you want someone to think of you when you're older and have a health issue? It's like they think they are not productive parts of society any more so they should just let them go and not do anything really to save their lives. This is bullshit. As the owner/operator of a non-profit for seniors I can tell you I have 90 year olds that are actively involved in their community and families and such. I wonder if this is how they feel about their grandparents?
Oddly enough she is having hallucinations again. They had cleared up when the infection got under control. She told me there was a pigeon walking around this morning. Then she said it was in the livingroom. I reminded her she was in the hospital. So.. with that said, I'm not sure if it's an hallucination or a dream because about a month ago a damn pigeon flew into our apt and landed on the windowsill in our livingroom. Dream about an event that happened... or hallucination? She just woke up again and told me "I didn't put anything in there". Not sure what the hell that was about but she pretty much repeated it word for word then fell back asleep.
Damn.. it is so noisy in here. Enough to wake the dead. She's near the nurses station and man they yak it up out there. And it's not medical business either. It's personal stuff, joking around, laughing very loudly, yelling across the place to each other. I guess they don't know this is a hospital and should be a quiet zone. I remember once when I was on cardiology I was near the nurses station, got very little sleep due to the noise and every time I got up and closed my door, I'd just get to seep and they would re-opened it.
Thursday, August 21, 2014
Thursday August 21st/2014
This morning I came a bit later since I called her nurse and checked on her and Michelle (who I may add is simply amazing!) told me that when she came on duty @ 7:30 am mom was perky and smiled at her and talked to her. yea!!! This did my old heart good :-)
Her morning was pretty good all in all. bp is holding, heart rate too.. then they decided they were going to do a ct scan and sent down the contrast for her to drink. Someone isn't listening when they're told she can't drink all that and has swallowing problems!! The communication skills in this place suck big time and it's one of my biggest gripes. You tell them something and no one listens and they have to find out for themselves but the one that pays the price is the patient. It's always the patient that pays. Michelle and I tried to get her to drink it but all she could get in her was maybe a fifth of it if that.
They came to get her around 2 pm and it's always so hard for her when they transfer her from her bed to a stretcher. They bounce her around all over the place and she's in so much pain in her tummy already and her back. It always sends her for a loop and she never does well for some time afterwards. This time was no different, she came back whiter and sicker and really weak. I let her sleep.
She got back about 3 pm'ish and not a half hour later a group of Dr's come in. 4 of them. They have news. The reason she was so bad on Monday was it turned out, a ruptured aneurysm of the gastroepiploic artery. She had an aneurysm! That's the reason for the massive and sudden bp drop and for how sick she was. In the ct scan it didn't look like it was leaking any more so when the specialists were consulted they decided not to do a procedure on her that is similar to an angiogram in a sense. They go through the groin artery and fish around to find the aneurysm and close it off themselves but it seems it is doing it on it's own which is a good thing. Her I.N.R. was really high, almost 7 (should be 2.5 - 3) so they gave her a moderate dose of vitamin K to clot the blood more. This will also help the artery to block itself off and seal up.
They thought they were going to have to give her two different blood products. One is to help reverse the thinness of her blood and the other is a transfusion if needed. Her blood count is low but holding so later after another blood work done, it showed that for now, she needs neither thankfully. Her I.N.R.'s came down significantly with the vitamin K and it saved the day.
So.. it's almost 8:30 pm and I'm just waiting now for her nurse to bring me her pills to give her. I usually do it because she can be problematic when it comes to them giving it to her. A lot of times she won't take them for them or even spits it out. When she is overtired, like at the end of the day, it can cause confusion in her too. Her evening nurse was saying in the morning she's confused until she gets her whereabouts which takes a few minutes. I think that's normal when you wake up in a strange place and you're sick. After I give her her pills I think I'm going to head home. I was suppose to go to crappy tire on my way home but it's getting late and I have to feed the dogs, take a shower, etc. yet before finding my bed and getting some sleep so I can get back here in the morning. Wondering who her nurse will be tomorrow. Michelle went on days off now and when she comes back, she's rotated so it's someone new. Hoping it's someone that knows mom form before, everything goes so much more smoothly when that is the case.
Her morning was pretty good all in all. bp is holding, heart rate too.. then they decided they were going to do a ct scan and sent down the contrast for her to drink. Someone isn't listening when they're told she can't drink all that and has swallowing problems!! The communication skills in this place suck big time and it's one of my biggest gripes. You tell them something and no one listens and they have to find out for themselves but the one that pays the price is the patient. It's always the patient that pays. Michelle and I tried to get her to drink it but all she could get in her was maybe a fifth of it if that.
They came to get her around 2 pm and it's always so hard for her when they transfer her from her bed to a stretcher. They bounce her around all over the place and she's in so much pain in her tummy already and her back. It always sends her for a loop and she never does well for some time afterwards. This time was no different, she came back whiter and sicker and really weak. I let her sleep.
She got back about 3 pm'ish and not a half hour later a group of Dr's come in. 4 of them. They have news. The reason she was so bad on Monday was it turned out, a ruptured aneurysm of the gastroepiploic artery. She had an aneurysm! That's the reason for the massive and sudden bp drop and for how sick she was. In the ct scan it didn't look like it was leaking any more so when the specialists were consulted they decided not to do a procedure on her that is similar to an angiogram in a sense. They go through the groin artery and fish around to find the aneurysm and close it off themselves but it seems it is doing it on it's own which is a good thing. Her I.N.R. was really high, almost 7 (should be 2.5 - 3) so they gave her a moderate dose of vitamin K to clot the blood more. This will also help the artery to block itself off and seal up.
They thought they were going to have to give her two different blood products. One is to help reverse the thinness of her blood and the other is a transfusion if needed. Her blood count is low but holding so later after another blood work done, it showed that for now, she needs neither thankfully. Her I.N.R.'s came down significantly with the vitamin K and it saved the day.
So.. it's almost 8:30 pm and I'm just waiting now for her nurse to bring me her pills to give her. I usually do it because she can be problematic when it comes to them giving it to her. A lot of times she won't take them for them or even spits it out. When she is overtired, like at the end of the day, it can cause confusion in her too. Her evening nurse was saying in the morning she's confused until she gets her whereabouts which takes a few minutes. I think that's normal when you wake up in a strange place and you're sick. After I give her her pills I think I'm going to head home. I was suppose to go to crappy tire on my way home but it's getting late and I have to feed the dogs, take a shower, etc. yet before finding my bed and getting some sleep so I can get back here in the morning. Wondering who her nurse will be tomorrow. Michelle went on days off now and when she comes back, she's rotated so it's someone new. Hoping it's someone that knows mom form before, everything goes so much more smoothly when that is the case.
Wednesday August 20/2014
Not too much to say about this day other than the usual. She still isn't eating, very weak, complaining about really bad tummy pain and nausea. She's looking weak but has opened her eyes now and then and has talked a bit which is a really good thing. Her bp is holding up, as is her heart rate. They take blood a lot which is hard on her but her I.N.R.'s are really high and they haven't given her any Coumadin since I brought her in so it's making no sense. What can I say.. none of this is making much sense.
She had some visitors today and actually opened her eyes and acknowledged them. My nephew Greg, one of my caregiver reliefs Gabriella, one of her p.s.w.'s Sadia who is like family for us, and an old friend of the family.
After one of them left I was so upset, actually seriously pissed right off. If you have nothing good to say then shut the fuck up. This person is a religious zealot and for her the only religion is her religion. She once actually bought a stamp and mailed me hate mail about Muslims through Canada Post. Really? I left her a voice mail I was so angry that she did that. I could have easily had her arrested for hate mail. I don't think she realizes that. So while here my mom asked me to bring her Buddha for her so she felt safe, watched over and not alone when no one was here. So this person just can't control herself... just has to spew... and says.. oh Buddha, that's just a gimmick!! I almost shit. Long and short of it I told her that if she wanted me to tell her what I think of her religion I'll gladly do it because right now I have no patience. I'll go toe to toe with her. Damn people need to learn to keep their opinions to themselves. If their God is so great, don't worry, he'll do the picking and choosing when the time comes... he doesn't have to say "hey... what do you think? Think I should let them in? Don't visit sick people in the hospital to crack off about them or their preferences. If you don't have something positive to say.. then like I said.. shut the fuck up. And if you think you simply can't help yourself.. then don't go. No one needs it or wants to hear it. If I wanted to hear an asshole, I'd fart.
She had some visitors today and actually opened her eyes and acknowledged them. My nephew Greg, one of my caregiver reliefs Gabriella, one of her p.s.w.'s Sadia who is like family for us, and an old friend of the family.
After one of them left I was so upset, actually seriously pissed right off. If you have nothing good to say then shut the fuck up. This person is a religious zealot and for her the only religion is her religion. She once actually bought a stamp and mailed me hate mail about Muslims through Canada Post. Really? I left her a voice mail I was so angry that she did that. I could have easily had her arrested for hate mail. I don't think she realizes that. So while here my mom asked me to bring her Buddha for her so she felt safe, watched over and not alone when no one was here. So this person just can't control herself... just has to spew... and says.. oh Buddha, that's just a gimmick!! I almost shit. Long and short of it I told her that if she wanted me to tell her what I think of her religion I'll gladly do it because right now I have no patience. I'll go toe to toe with her. Damn people need to learn to keep their opinions to themselves. If their God is so great, don't worry, he'll do the picking and choosing when the time comes... he doesn't have to say "hey... what do you think? Think I should let them in? Don't visit sick people in the hospital to crack off about them or their preferences. If you don't have something positive to say.. then like I said.. shut the fuck up. And if you think you simply can't help yourself.. then don't go. No one needs it or wants to hear it. If I wanted to hear an asshole, I'd fart.
more on Tuesday August 19th...
I stopped writing yesterday because all hell broke loose. All of a sudden my mom crashed. Her nurse recognized what was going on and called the i.c.u. and the i.c.u. team ran down. They worked on her for more than an hour. We were so lucky that Caroline (the nurse) was there. It was Caroline and Bev that pulled my mom through in 2010 and basically saved her life. Then there was Caroline again and again, as far as I'm concerned, she saved her life with the i.c.u. team.
It wasn't good. They could not get a bp on her at all. Even with the doplar machine they could barely raise anything. They were not sure she would make it and at first were telling me to call my family. They forced fluids in her, you name it they did it. By a couple of hours later she was stabilizing and her blood pressure was up. She was holding and now the Dr was fairly sure she was going to make it through the night and told me to go home and get some sleep. I was exhausted, physically and emotionally. I was watching her die and them working so hard on her.
Finally later that evening the Dr. told me she was holding her own and to go home and get some sleep. Which I did. I jumped in the shower, towel dried my hair, took care of the dogs and went to bed, all within an hour. I didn't wake up for 4 hrs the first time! Didn't get up until about 8 or 8:30 which is late for me.
Before I went home though... there is a man in her room... yes... this place always puts men in with women. In this case he has either Alzheimers or Dementia, he's been here 6 weeks now and he needs to be watched because he can wander. He also gets very aggressive and agitated at times. So for well over an hour, while I'm sitting there with my mom he is having a conversation, mostly with himself.. he used to be a professor and he thinks he is teaching a class again, we are his students. Today's topic is sex with the therapist!! oh yes... the Psychiatrists here have sex with the sophomores!! He has seen them. According to him we all have and we are just ignoring it. They do it all the time in the open according to him. The sitter is trying to calm him and change the subject but he gets fixated on things and this is one of them. Then he starts going on about masturbation and how they all masterbate and how many fingers they use.... etc. etc. etc. What I wouldn't give for a pair of earplugs.
urban angle my big old fat ass........ this place is the Devil's Den and the 14th floor is hell.
It wasn't good. They could not get a bp on her at all. Even with the doplar machine they could barely raise anything. They were not sure she would make it and at first were telling me to call my family. They forced fluids in her, you name it they did it. By a couple of hours later she was stabilizing and her blood pressure was up. She was holding and now the Dr was fairly sure she was going to make it through the night and told me to go home and get some sleep. I was exhausted, physically and emotionally. I was watching her die and them working so hard on her.
Finally later that evening the Dr. told me she was holding her own and to go home and get some sleep. Which I did. I jumped in the shower, towel dried my hair, took care of the dogs and went to bed, all within an hour. I didn't wake up for 4 hrs the first time! Didn't get up until about 8 or 8:30 which is late for me.
Before I went home though... there is a man in her room... yes... this place always puts men in with women. In this case he has either Alzheimers or Dementia, he's been here 6 weeks now and he needs to be watched because he can wander. He also gets very aggressive and agitated at times. So for well over an hour, while I'm sitting there with my mom he is having a conversation, mostly with himself.. he used to be a professor and he thinks he is teaching a class again, we are his students. Today's topic is sex with the therapist!! oh yes... the Psychiatrists here have sex with the sophomores!! He has seen them. According to him we all have and we are just ignoring it. They do it all the time in the open according to him. The sitter is trying to calm him and change the subject but he gets fixated on things and this is one of them. Then he starts going on about masturbation and how they all masterbate and how many fingers they use.... etc. etc. etc. What I wouldn't give for a pair of earplugs.
urban angle my big old fat ass........ this place is the Devil's Den and the 14th floor is hell.
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Tuesday August 19th, 2014
Been here since early... nurse last night made it sound like my mom was dying and told me to be here really early... 7:30 at the latest. geez needless to say I'm running on what's left of my energy which isn't much these days. Got myself some breakfast while she's down getting another chest x-ray. Poor old woman is going to glow in the dark soon.
I have not seen her Dr. yet. She is in a room with 2 others, one male and one female. She is in the stroke section of 14 even though she has had no stroke. Kind of freaked me out when I noticed where she was but I ran into Bev, her old nurse and she told me if they wander or are a safety threat to themselves they put them there now. There is a sitter in her room, a lady. On her break now and I don't care for the fill in really. I went down to get some breakfast and got 3 sausage and a scrambled egg and doesn't she ask me to move up the room more, the food is bothering her! It's making her hungry. Really? So what the hell did you do when you had to feed a patient their breakfast???? So I moved not 2 feet up and I swear she said that was better. Freakin neurotic. I really don't have the patience for these people today.
Oh my god.. these f'in people. Want me to leave my scooter out in the hall. This is a room for 4 people, there are only 3 in it. My mom is in a space big enough for 2 people but it's just her. So there is a lot of empty space here. Don't these two sitters get all uppity telling me to leave my scooter in the hall. I tell them no way, it has all my id in it, food in it, everything I need for the day while I'm here. They have the nerve to tell me to take it all out and bring it in with me. Yea, sure, with no bags yet.. I tell them that there is only one sitter in this room, why do they need 3 chairs in the way? Felt like telling them to shut the fuck up. It's taking everything I have right now to bite my tongue.
Anyway, seems that her super shakes are not coming yet. I got here and there was some kind of orange gel (she hates orange other than the sherbert), a cranberry juice, an apple juice (everything is very acidic) and a tea. She drinks coffee. No one fed her any of it although the calories wouldn't really count.
When I got here I gave her a wee sip of apple juice. She won't even take her meds for anyone and actually tried to bite a nurse last night and they took her damn teeth out for it!!! I found them this morning sitting out on her little dresser, dried out. I hope they're willing to pay for a new pair if they break.
A volunteer came in and asked to pick up the menu's but she doesn't have one. I heard the nurse say she is on a cardiac diet, no salt. No mention of the super shake.
2 pm and I'm still here. It's been a long day. I'm trying to type on a slant because the regular sitter is gone again for lunch and miss neurotic is here and is more concerned about my laptop than anything else in here.
Look, this place wants to get rid of the sitters. They bitch that they spend a million a year on sitters yet it's proven not to prevent falls, etc. Well no shit Einstein. That's because they are so damn busy feeding their faces, reading their books, doing puzzles, reading newspapers and talking on their freakin cell phones what the hell do you expect? You think maybe they would prevent situations if they actually did their job?
These people are useless, they run in and out of the room they are suppose to be in to yak with each other and joke around. It's also wrong how they care for these folks, most of which are elderly. They antagonize them literally and lie to them to get them to do something they don't want to do. It's just wrong.
The regular sitter, I admit, has her hands full with one particular patient here, a man. He wants to get up and go for a walk. Of course they can't allow that but he is also anxious. He really wants out of bed. He's been here 6 weeks now and he has to stay in bed or sit in this chair that has a tray that they can snap on and restrain him. At times he is quite lucid. He told her he didn't want to be restrained in the chair. His words. She forced it anyway. Then she proceeds to tell him if he sits there for a while she will let him out to go play the piano! Really? No.. she's bullshitting him. I think this floor does have a piano on it on the other side. She keeps reinforcing this lie to him. Now he's getting agitated because time has passed and he wants the piano. She told him he could go play it. Has she no experience with people with dementia or delusions? They fixate on things. Although they tend to forget everything you want them to remember they remember things you want them to forget.
The next thing you know she's on her cell phone talking to her contractor/painter about painting around her windows. Then she takes yet another call from a friend who it seems is also a contractor and she's chastising him about not telling her because she would have hired him instead. I'm just sitting here rolling my damn eyes when all of a sudden you hear a loud crack and I turn around and here is this elderly man snapping off the restraining table.
So... why is there no fall prevention when there is a sitter in the room? That one story should tell you something. But.. it's a way for this hospital to cut their budget and of course the cut seriously effects the patients but hey.. it saves them $1 million a year now doesn't it?
2:30 pm and my mom is gasping for breath and is looking even paler if that's at all possible. I get the nurse, ask if she can have oxygen and am told it's not prescribed. I explain she has it at home and is having a problem breathing. She takes her bp and it's down too low, tries the other arm and it's almost ok. As is her heart rate so I don't know what's going on but it's not good. She is getting agitated at times but I told the nurse she is weaker now then when I came in this morning.
Dr's came in, her blood pressure is low and she's getting dehydrated again. One Dr is trying to tell me she is looking better than she did yesterday when she saw her. ya think? I certainly don't. She looks worse than yesterday and much worse today. She seems to be struggling at times. I'm getting afraid to leave her.
I have not seen her Dr. yet. She is in a room with 2 others, one male and one female. She is in the stroke section of 14 even though she has had no stroke. Kind of freaked me out when I noticed where she was but I ran into Bev, her old nurse and she told me if they wander or are a safety threat to themselves they put them there now. There is a sitter in her room, a lady. On her break now and I don't care for the fill in really. I went down to get some breakfast and got 3 sausage and a scrambled egg and doesn't she ask me to move up the room more, the food is bothering her! It's making her hungry. Really? So what the hell did you do when you had to feed a patient their breakfast???? So I moved not 2 feet up and I swear she said that was better. Freakin neurotic. I really don't have the patience for these people today.
Oh my god.. these f'in people. Want me to leave my scooter out in the hall. This is a room for 4 people, there are only 3 in it. My mom is in a space big enough for 2 people but it's just her. So there is a lot of empty space here. Don't these two sitters get all uppity telling me to leave my scooter in the hall. I tell them no way, it has all my id in it, food in it, everything I need for the day while I'm here. They have the nerve to tell me to take it all out and bring it in with me. Yea, sure, with no bags yet.. I tell them that there is only one sitter in this room, why do they need 3 chairs in the way? Felt like telling them to shut the fuck up. It's taking everything I have right now to bite my tongue.
Anyway, seems that her super shakes are not coming yet. I got here and there was some kind of orange gel (she hates orange other than the sherbert), a cranberry juice, an apple juice (everything is very acidic) and a tea. She drinks coffee. No one fed her any of it although the calories wouldn't really count.
When I got here I gave her a wee sip of apple juice. She won't even take her meds for anyone and actually tried to bite a nurse last night and they took her damn teeth out for it!!! I found them this morning sitting out on her little dresser, dried out. I hope they're willing to pay for a new pair if they break.
A volunteer came in and asked to pick up the menu's but she doesn't have one. I heard the nurse say she is on a cardiac diet, no salt. No mention of the super shake.
2 pm and I'm still here. It's been a long day. I'm trying to type on a slant because the regular sitter is gone again for lunch and miss neurotic is here and is more concerned about my laptop than anything else in here.
Look, this place wants to get rid of the sitters. They bitch that they spend a million a year on sitters yet it's proven not to prevent falls, etc. Well no shit Einstein. That's because they are so damn busy feeding their faces, reading their books, doing puzzles, reading newspapers and talking on their freakin cell phones what the hell do you expect? You think maybe they would prevent situations if they actually did their job?
These people are useless, they run in and out of the room they are suppose to be in to yak with each other and joke around. It's also wrong how they care for these folks, most of which are elderly. They antagonize them literally and lie to them to get them to do something they don't want to do. It's just wrong.
The regular sitter, I admit, has her hands full with one particular patient here, a man. He wants to get up and go for a walk. Of course they can't allow that but he is also anxious. He really wants out of bed. He's been here 6 weeks now and he has to stay in bed or sit in this chair that has a tray that they can snap on and restrain him. At times he is quite lucid. He told her he didn't want to be restrained in the chair. His words. She forced it anyway. Then she proceeds to tell him if he sits there for a while she will let him out to go play the piano! Really? No.. she's bullshitting him. I think this floor does have a piano on it on the other side. She keeps reinforcing this lie to him. Now he's getting agitated because time has passed and he wants the piano. She told him he could go play it. Has she no experience with people with dementia or delusions? They fixate on things. Although they tend to forget everything you want them to remember they remember things you want them to forget.
The next thing you know she's on her cell phone talking to her contractor/painter about painting around her windows. Then she takes yet another call from a friend who it seems is also a contractor and she's chastising him about not telling her because she would have hired him instead. I'm just sitting here rolling my damn eyes when all of a sudden you hear a loud crack and I turn around and here is this elderly man snapping off the restraining table.
So... why is there no fall prevention when there is a sitter in the room? That one story should tell you something. But.. it's a way for this hospital to cut their budget and of course the cut seriously effects the patients but hey.. it saves them $1 million a year now doesn't it?
2:30 pm and my mom is gasping for breath and is looking even paler if that's at all possible. I get the nurse, ask if she can have oxygen and am told it's not prescribed. I explain she has it at home and is having a problem breathing. She takes her bp and it's down too low, tries the other arm and it's almost ok. As is her heart rate so I don't know what's going on but it's not good. She is getting agitated at times but I told the nurse she is weaker now then when I came in this morning.
Dr's came in, her blood pressure is low and she's getting dehydrated again. One Dr is trying to tell me she is looking better than she did yesterday when she saw her. ya think? I certainly don't. She looks worse than yesterday and much worse today. She seems to be struggling at times. I'm getting afraid to leave her.
Monday, August 18, 2014
What a night .. and day.. Monday August 18/2014
Not sure what time I went to bed last night nor what time I fell asleep. Had a hard time for me to wake up too. I'm bushed. Finally dragged myself out of bed around 11 am for crying out loud and called the hospital to check on her. Found out she's still down in emergency! 15 hrs and she's still here. They put me through to talk to someone here and they told me she had a bad night. Was VERY combative and continued to try to get out of bed. Doing that could have caused her to break something. So he then informs me that they had to put her into "soft restraints". I felt a lump in my throat and it sank to my stomach. I felt sick at the thought.
I told him I would be there soon. When I got here, her space was empty. Turns out they took her for an x-ray for some reason. Still don't know why. Will continue to ask. When they finally brought her back they did so in a full hospital bed. They took her off one of those horrible stretchers and got her an actual hospital bed.
She was restrained with these things around her wrist with like a sponge material and they were each tied down to the bed. She was yelling at everyone. They had to clean her and she literally fought them the entire time. I've never seen her like this. She's like a little tiger, screaming and yelling at them to stop it, leave her alone, she was cold, she had a headache. They got her cleaned up and she just curled back up. She hasn't even acknowledged me. I may as well not be here but I won't leave no matter. Let her sleep and hopefully she'll sleep some of it off. She is complaining of a bad headached. She did last night too. Not sure what the hell that is about because she isn't a headache type person.
Wondering when she's going to get a damn bed in a real room. This place needs a bigger emerg and more rooms. The also need damn drapes that close to give some privacy. The c.a. here ended up getting a safety pin to hold the drapes together while they changed her.
It's 5:30 pm and if I could smack a nurse there is one with a target on her forehead here. Had the nerve to tell me that my mom is faking it!!! She says she's fine one minute and then when someone comes she plays like she's all confused. She said this in regards to my nephew coming by. She says mom was fine and then when Greg came she played confused. Here comes my potty mouth... I told another nurse that if that ones doesn't know how delirium works then she should shut the fuck up. Delirium does come and go with some people or lessens and then comes on strong. Stupid bitch. I'll find out her name and put a complaint in about her before mom is finished with this hospital stay. I'm sure nothing will be done, this hospital obviously allows pretty much anything but at least I'll get it off my chest and it's now blogged too. Now all I need is for this blog to go viral .... I wish it would. Someone said that St. Mike's would sue me.. go for it ... just go for it. Could you imagine the shit that would come out in that trial????
Called my nephew to see how it went when he dropped in to see her and he told me she wasn't very responsive even to him. That's unusual. If anyone can get her to respond it's me or Greg. Greg also told me that bitch nurse told him she was faking it at times too.
Almost 6 pm and trying to get her to take her meds and she won't take them. Her blood pressure is way out of control at 181/116. And that's thanks to that bitch Dr. D'Silva. Am I angry? You betcha. If something serious happens to my mom I will go after her for my mom. She took her off all the meds I told her to leave her on. The meds that control her heart rate and her b.p. and now both are out of control. Hopefully that cow never treats her own mom. Her nurse is going to call the Dr's upstairs and ask if she can give her the bp meds via I.V.
So.. Dr. comes down, looks all of 18 .. either I'm getting old or they are getting younger and younger. Anyway he tells me she's combative at times, delusional, over tired and sleeping a lot and not taking her meds. DUH!! ya think? This is why I brought her in. Anyway, he's not happy but he'll put her b.p. meds into the I.V. for her. Finally considering her bp has been up for days. Tells me like I'm an idiot that he can't give her a sedative to stop some of the agitation because she's so sluggish. Sure.. let's just crash her entire system. Idiot. I wasn't asking them to do that. She's out of it enough already.
Also, the only thing I can get out of her right now is her head aches.. I keep putting it down to all the noise in this emerg and the bright lights and such. Finally someone tells me that the patch I discovered on her back is NITRO! No damn wonder she has a headache to beat all headaches. I'll never forget the first time they gave me nitro, it was with my first heart attack in the emerg. I honestly don't know what was worse, the chest pain from the heart attack or the headache from the nitro. Felt like someone took a ballpeen hammer and hit me between the eyes and split my head right open from front to back. No exaggeration. So she probably has a headache much like that and then add all the noise and lights.
Oh.. I'm told there are no rooms in the hospital at all !!! That's why she is still down here in emerg. This place is a zoo. The E. D.'s really need to take some pay cuts to hire nurses and do some building up to add floors. Where the hell is all the money going that people donate? If you come into this hospital the first thing you get when you get home is on their damn donation list and you get an onslaught of bloody letters asking for money.
6:25 pm.. ok, it's official.. they are trying to kill her for sure. Guy comes in with a food tray for her. She's been on a strict liquid diet for 4 years now so they give her... a very dry vegetarian pattie, cumin sweet potatoes, hard green peas and a brownie. really???? guy says he knew nothing about her diet. Told him it's right on her chart but again he says no one told him about it... for Christ sake... get your shit together. If she was slightly awake and tried to eat any of that crap she would have aspirated it and ended up in i.c.u. again.
I told him I would be there soon. When I got here, her space was empty. Turns out they took her for an x-ray for some reason. Still don't know why. Will continue to ask. When they finally brought her back they did so in a full hospital bed. They took her off one of those horrible stretchers and got her an actual hospital bed.
She was restrained with these things around her wrist with like a sponge material and they were each tied down to the bed. She was yelling at everyone. They had to clean her and she literally fought them the entire time. I've never seen her like this. She's like a little tiger, screaming and yelling at them to stop it, leave her alone, she was cold, she had a headache. They got her cleaned up and she just curled back up. She hasn't even acknowledged me. I may as well not be here but I won't leave no matter. Let her sleep and hopefully she'll sleep some of it off. She is complaining of a bad headached. She did last night too. Not sure what the hell that is about because she isn't a headache type person.
Wondering when she's going to get a damn bed in a real room. This place needs a bigger emerg and more rooms. The also need damn drapes that close to give some privacy. The c.a. here ended up getting a safety pin to hold the drapes together while they changed her.
It's 5:30 pm and if I could smack a nurse there is one with a target on her forehead here. Had the nerve to tell me that my mom is faking it!!! She says she's fine one minute and then when someone comes she plays like she's all confused. She said this in regards to my nephew coming by. She says mom was fine and then when Greg came she played confused. Here comes my potty mouth... I told another nurse that if that ones doesn't know how delirium works then she should shut the fuck up. Delirium does come and go with some people or lessens and then comes on strong. Stupid bitch. I'll find out her name and put a complaint in about her before mom is finished with this hospital stay. I'm sure nothing will be done, this hospital obviously allows pretty much anything but at least I'll get it off my chest and it's now blogged too. Now all I need is for this blog to go viral .... I wish it would. Someone said that St. Mike's would sue me.. go for it ... just go for it. Could you imagine the shit that would come out in that trial????
Called my nephew to see how it went when he dropped in to see her and he told me she wasn't very responsive even to him. That's unusual. If anyone can get her to respond it's me or Greg. Greg also told me that bitch nurse told him she was faking it at times too.
Almost 6 pm and trying to get her to take her meds and she won't take them. Her blood pressure is way out of control at 181/116. And that's thanks to that bitch Dr. D'Silva. Am I angry? You betcha. If something serious happens to my mom I will go after her for my mom. She took her off all the meds I told her to leave her on. The meds that control her heart rate and her b.p. and now both are out of control. Hopefully that cow never treats her own mom. Her nurse is going to call the Dr's upstairs and ask if she can give her the bp meds via I.V.
So.. Dr. comes down, looks all of 18 .. either I'm getting old or they are getting younger and younger. Anyway he tells me she's combative at times, delusional, over tired and sleeping a lot and not taking her meds. DUH!! ya think? This is why I brought her in. Anyway, he's not happy but he'll put her b.p. meds into the I.V. for her. Finally considering her bp has been up for days. Tells me like I'm an idiot that he can't give her a sedative to stop some of the agitation because she's so sluggish. Sure.. let's just crash her entire system. Idiot. I wasn't asking them to do that. She's out of it enough already.
Also, the only thing I can get out of her right now is her head aches.. I keep putting it down to all the noise in this emerg and the bright lights and such. Finally someone tells me that the patch I discovered on her back is NITRO! No damn wonder she has a headache to beat all headaches. I'll never forget the first time they gave me nitro, it was with my first heart attack in the emerg. I honestly don't know what was worse, the chest pain from the heart attack or the headache from the nitro. Felt like someone took a ballpeen hammer and hit me between the eyes and split my head right open from front to back. No exaggeration. So she probably has a headache much like that and then add all the noise and lights.
Oh.. I'm told there are no rooms in the hospital at all !!! That's why she is still down here in emerg. This place is a zoo. The E. D.'s really need to take some pay cuts to hire nurses and do some building up to add floors. Where the hell is all the money going that people donate? If you come into this hospital the first thing you get when you get home is on their damn donation list and you get an onslaught of bloody letters asking for money.
6:25 pm.. ok, it's official.. they are trying to kill her for sure. Guy comes in with a food tray for her. She's been on a strict liquid diet for 4 years now so they give her... a very dry vegetarian pattie, cumin sweet potatoes, hard green peas and a brownie. really???? guy says he knew nothing about her diet. Told him it's right on her chart but again he says no one told him about it... for Christ sake... get your shit together. If she was slightly awake and tried to eat any of that crap she would have aspirated it and ended up in i.c.u. again.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
shit.. here we go again.
oh shit, here we go again. At 8 pm Sunday August 17th I called an ambulance to take mom back to S. Michael's hospital. This infection isn't going away. Probably would have got a better hold on it if that damn Dr. D'Silva had not been so damn eager to shove her home and had waited for the 2nd part of the test. It would have showed it wasn't receptive to Cipro. It should have been to the other one that the family Dr of ours put her on though. I'm wondering if it got such a hold thanks to the wrong meds that the right one wouldn't even work right.
Today started out not bad. She actually took her morning meds. Yesterday she spit them out at me. I thought "finally... we re going around the bend and something is finally working". I was wrong though. By noon she was looking pale and sleeping all the time. I had to keep waking her up to give her a drink of water or her liquid diet. By 6 pm all hell was breaking loose and she was yelling for me every 5 minutes and wanting to get out of bed herself. By7 pm when her psw came she was combative. Wouldn't let her touch her. Kept yelling she wanted out of bed. Wouldn't let her put her pj's on her. Nothing. I finally told her she had to and got firm with her which is really hard but it worked. We got her ready for bed and cleaned up and then I called an ambulance.
Got her here and I followed a little bit later after printing her meds and getting the dogs ready for when I went out and around 9 pm I got here and there she was, on the stretcher still waiting in the main waiting room of the hospital.
About 9:30 pm they finally took her in and put her into intermediate care, not the regular trauma room she usually goes in due to her heart.
I left the hospital around 3 am I think. In between I spoke to many Dr's. Mom's disposition changed on and off but was good for the most part although confused at times. I've never seen her so bad that she didn't know her own name at one point but always knew mine. Next thing you know, she's clear as a bell. When the Dr asked her if she knew what City she was in she got this look on her face like he was nuts and said "Toronto of course"! lol
When I left they had put in an i.v. for her for the upcoming antibiotics. She was calm and willing to try to sleep and was ok for me to go home. She was concerned for her dogs and that they get out and then go to bed too.
Today started out not bad. She actually took her morning meds. Yesterday she spit them out at me. I thought "finally... we re going around the bend and something is finally working". I was wrong though. By noon she was looking pale and sleeping all the time. I had to keep waking her up to give her a drink of water or her liquid diet. By 6 pm all hell was breaking loose and she was yelling for me every 5 minutes and wanting to get out of bed herself. By7 pm when her psw came she was combative. Wouldn't let her touch her. Kept yelling she wanted out of bed. Wouldn't let her put her pj's on her. Nothing. I finally told her she had to and got firm with her which is really hard but it worked. We got her ready for bed and cleaned up and then I called an ambulance.
Got her here and I followed a little bit later after printing her meds and getting the dogs ready for when I went out and around 9 pm I got here and there she was, on the stretcher still waiting in the main waiting room of the hospital.
About 9:30 pm they finally took her in and put her into intermediate care, not the regular trauma room she usually goes in due to her heart.
I left the hospital around 3 am I think. In between I spoke to many Dr's. Mom's disposition changed on and off but was good for the most part although confused at times. I've never seen her so bad that she didn't know her own name at one point but always knew mine. Next thing you know, she's clear as a bell. When the Dr asked her if she knew what City she was in she got this look on her face like he was nuts and said "Toronto of course"! lol
When I left they had put in an i.v. for her for the upcoming antibiotics. She was calm and willing to try to sleep and was ok for me to go home. She was concerned for her dogs and that they get out and then go to bed too.
The crap care at this place starts again....
I took my mom back into St. Michael's Hospital in downtown Toronto yet again at about 7:30 am on Monday August 4th. She was in delirium and had fallen out of bed. She spent all day and into the evening in the emerg waiting for a room to come available on the General Medicine floor. The 14th floor where nothing ever goes well for her. :-( (other than the last visit). The problems started immediately.
She needs a sitter because she is in an unsafe, unstable condition. She tries to get out of bed due to delirium and is seeing things thanks to an infection. So they put her in a room with 2 other patients. Both of which are men. The one beside her is fine.. however.. the one across from her looks like he's in a serious detox and likes to lay there with nothing on but a diaper and touching/rubbing it or spreading his legs. Oh yeah, if you go back in this blog you'll see this kind of thing is the norm at this hospital, not the exception. Needless to say, my mom is very upset and he scares her. Scares me a bit too the way he looks. All red in the face, hair all greasy and stringy and nothing he is saying is making any sense.
The sitter she has is yet another matter. Male as well but that means squat. They have some very good male sitters but this one is something else. They need to take my mom to get a ct scan of her head to be sure she didn't hit it and there's no problems so this guy grabs the gurney and slams it into her bed jarring the hell out of her and making her cry out in pain and start to cry. He's certainly got my attention now. Mr. Expose Himself is now attentive too. Then what does this sitter do? Well he needs to move her from the bed to the stretcher so he whips off her sheets leaving her pretty much exposed to Mr. Expose Himself! Now she's freaking out laying there in nothing much more than a little t-shirt and her drapes wide open and this asshole doesn't give a rat's ass. I jump in at this point and yell for him to give her a bit of respect and decency and shut the damn drapes. He smirks, gives me a look as if to tell me to fuck off and proceeds to drag her onto the stretcher. I run up, grab one drape as another c.a. grabs one too and we pull them shut.
They take her down for a ct scan and I go head hunting for that bastards head. I tell them that the guy is exposing himself and what the sitter did and I wanted her moved from there. I want them both away from her. Then I'm told that they can't!! They can't afford a sitter to sit with just her so if I want her moved then they will however she won't have a sitter for her protection/safety! oh.. but Mr. Expose Himself will have one?? Absolutely!
Their end result to fix this issue is to have Mr. Expose Himself pull his drapes and to change the sitter with another one. The sitter solution was fine by me but every time someone pulled that pigs drapes he pulled them back! That's quite the solution St. Mikes... quite the solution. Now my elderly mom is terrorized by this pig.
"Urban Angel" my ass.. more like the "Devil's Den"
I would take her elsewhere but the problem with that is her family Dr who is simply amazing is with that hospital. Her cardiologist who is also amazing is there too. Her tummy Dr that she's had for 17 years now and knows her literally inside and out.. is also there, as is her arthritis specialist. So.. with that being said, every test, every scan, every scope, every x-ray, every I.N.R., every everything she's had done to her since they closed the beloved Wellesley Hospital is right there at a Dr's fingertips to see. No second guessing, no 50,000 questions, all the answers to their questions are right there in front of them. This isn't available other places. And it can make a difference in her care, especially in the emerg who for the most part, work great. It's once you get upstairs to that general medicine ward that will kill you. Or scar you psychologically for life.
Right now I'm limited with time due to my mom's illness thanks to 2 Dr's at St. Michael's hospital. Dr. Jennifer Watts and Dr. D'Silva, both of the Geriatric dept in there. Don't know D'Silva's first name however I'm sure there aren't too many Dr. D'Sillva's on the Geriatric team during this time period. Young woman. Anyway, don't ever let either one of them touch your loved one. You'll be lucky they don't kill them. If I wasn't there constantly and overseeing most everything I don't believe I would have brought my mom home. What's worse, they wouldn't listen to their patient when she told them not to do something, and not to change her meds. Then they wouldn't listen to me as her Power of Attorney so the long and short of it is this...
1) They took her off her Diltiazem (her heart med) and she was tachycardic twice. Enough to put her on fluids to settle everything down including her blood pressure because that med also regulated her blood pressure.
2) They jacked up her other 2 blood pressure pills because of course they removed her heart med that helped regulate it.
3) They took her off her Lasix (her water pill) and after giving her bolus (large amounts of fluids fast) twice she then had a crackle in her lung which meant there could very well be fluid there. When I got her home her one ankle was swollen one morning and she had fluid filled bags under her eyes and still did by the Friday when I took her to her family Dr.
4) They removed her domperidone for her swallowing issues and in little time it was more difficult for her to swallow too. This means since she's on a liquid diet due to swallowing issues, she's getting less and less calories as time goes one. She definitely lost weight again in there.
5) They removed her from her iron even though her iron was low.
6) They removed her from her pain medications even though we told them not to. They put her on a different one that she can tolerate at very low doses (1 mg) however they were pumping her full of the shit and she simply curled up crying in constant pain and saying she wanted to die. At times she was fairly unresponsive.
7) When I finally lost it on Watt and wrote a letter to her boss D'Silva telling her I wanted Watt to have nothing to do with my mom's care, not to even have consulting privileges didn't D'Silva step in and start bullshitting us too and damn near overdosed her again. This time she said she would agree to putting her back on her old pain meds so she could get some relief and the minute I left the hospital, she cut it back in half and I found this out via the nurse. Next day I took it up with them again and again they said they would start her back on her old pain meds and again reversed it when I left and only gave her one dose for the entire day and only gave her a minimum dose at that. I told them I wanted it started back slowly and each day to add a bit more until we got her back on track but nope.. they'd rather see her suffer. I knew this was a safe way to do it because I spoke to a pharmacist that was well acquainted with my mom and he told me how to do it safely. In the end she was only getting 30 mg of codeine once a day there for a couple of lousy days, in excruciating pain because of it and then this dumbass Dr comes up with pumping 60 mgs all at once into her? Oh goodie, let's just kill her off. The 60 mg's never happened, I wouldn't allow it no matter what.
Something else bizarre happened too and I'm sure it's in regards to those meds they kept pumping into her that were doing nothing but putting her out in some zone never mind even on the planet... on the Saturday she was there she saw yet another Dr. A young man, very nice. While he was talking to me and her (although she wasn't really listening) her jaw started to chatter for lack of a better description. Like someone freezing cold. I never saw anything like that before and told the Dr to look at her. I asked him why it was happening and she's never done that and he didn't know. I'm no Dr but I'm putting it down to the overload of that freakin hydromorphone. At this point in time she was on 3 mg slow acting and throughout a few hours another 5 mgs @ 1 mg per hour. No wonder she didn't know where the hell she was and her jaw was jiggling.
8) Meanwhile Monday morning my mom was complaining that it burned when she peed so this means that the infection was still there and more so so I let them know. For some reason, probably because D'Silva was tired of me, we got a new young Dr who was amazing. She not only ordered a urine test on my mom, she also ordered an x-ray of her lungs since she also heard a crackle in there that she normally doesn't have. Seems D'Silva heard it the day before but chose to ignore that as well.
9) All along my mom had been delusional as well due to the infection but between Watt's and D'Silva it simply didn't matter. It's normal. On my mom's last day there she was even combative and I told D'Silva who reappeared that morning because she wanted my mom out of the hospital regardless of what else was going on. So that morning she was seeing pink turtles on her bed. Little bitty ones. She had not slept one night since she got there which wasn't helping the confusion. It burned when she peed. Her lung had a crackle and she had turned combative but she was going home. And she was in more pain than ever because she wasn't getting proper pain control for a week now. Exactly how long do they think an 88 yr old little lady can tolerate full blown pain?
10) D'Silva called a transport ambulance for her and ordered Cipro for my mom. Even though I had told her that at times it has not worked for my mom. She was so freakin eager to get rid of this little old lady who was now sicker than when she went in there that she didn't even bother to wait for the 2nd part of the test. The "sensitivity" test. This part tells you basically what kind of anti-biotic to use for that particular kind of bacteria. So she just shoves her on Cipro and ships her home @ 1 pm on Tuesday August 12th barely able to smile when she got home .
While home I know something isn't working... my mom is getting sicker. And more hallucinations too. That night she was seeing all sorts of things. People in her room that either owed her $150 or wanted $150. Things on the wall. Mumbling and muttering that I couldn't make any sense of. But of course, we have to remember that all this shit is alright according to Watts & D'Silva. She tries to get out of bed which is nothing short of frightening because she can't walk and will fall again and possibly this time seriously hurt herself. Even her sitter is scared.
I call her family Dr's nurse and leave a message telling her what is going on and Wednesday evening about 9 pm her Dr called me to discuss it. I told him she's getting worse instead of better and as I started to tell him that D'Silva shoved her out the door with Cipro without waiting for the sensitivity test he told me he knew and that's another reason why he's calling, the bacteria isn't sensitive to Cipro, she's on a drug that is doing nothing for her!! He then faxed that night a new prescription for a new antibiotic for her which she started Thursday around noon.
By now though things are not looking good. I take her into our family Dr on Friday afternoon and he's rather dismayed at how she looks. Her bp is ok but not like it normally is. Due to the fact she's not her normal perky self and is barely holding herself up in her wheelchair, she looks pale, guant and is crying at times, he doesn't want to do anything with her meds other than her pain meds for some relief. I have to call him Monday morning again.
All day yesterday and last night she was just laying there.. barely lucid it seemed at times. I was so worried I took her bp and then called the family Dr's service to speak to the Dr on call. Her bp was up and he had me push her back and she was tender. If she has a kidney infection now due to all of this I'll do something even if it's only blog and blog again about those 2 Dr's to save some other family's loved one from their reaches.
Suing isn't an answer. No lawyer out there will take on a case with an elderly person in bad health. A lawyer literally told me this a couple of years ago when I contacted lawyers about my mom and that damn place. He actually told me that no one would take her case because they were afraid that 2 years down the line when the case finally got to court that she would pass away and no one would be able to cover their fee's at that point! I told him that's illegal.. it's ageism... he said that's true but that's why no one would take her case. Listen.. if those asses did it 4 years ago when she had a clear cut case with them the case would be over and done and she would have won I'm sure.
Further to all this.. let me tell you, that before she got the urinary infection that sent her to the hospital this time, for years now her blood pressure has been right on.. her A-Fib has been so well controlled that it is almost undetectable... she had no swelling.. and when her family Dr gave her meds for a urinary infection he always waited for BOTH tests to come back.
It's Sunday August 17th, 2014 and I'm worried that I am going to have to take her back to the hospital. She woke up a bit more alert this morning and took her meds but in the last couple of hours she is waning agqin. I just asked her her name and she couldn't tell me. She is looking sick again. If I take her back I absolutely refuse to let Geriatric's touch her.
She needs a sitter because she is in an unsafe, unstable condition. She tries to get out of bed due to delirium and is seeing things thanks to an infection. So they put her in a room with 2 other patients. Both of which are men. The one beside her is fine.. however.. the one across from her looks like he's in a serious detox and likes to lay there with nothing on but a diaper and touching/rubbing it or spreading his legs. Oh yeah, if you go back in this blog you'll see this kind of thing is the norm at this hospital, not the exception. Needless to say, my mom is very upset and he scares her. Scares me a bit too the way he looks. All red in the face, hair all greasy and stringy and nothing he is saying is making any sense.
The sitter she has is yet another matter. Male as well but that means squat. They have some very good male sitters but this one is something else. They need to take my mom to get a ct scan of her head to be sure she didn't hit it and there's no problems so this guy grabs the gurney and slams it into her bed jarring the hell out of her and making her cry out in pain and start to cry. He's certainly got my attention now. Mr. Expose Himself is now attentive too. Then what does this sitter do? Well he needs to move her from the bed to the stretcher so he whips off her sheets leaving her pretty much exposed to Mr. Expose Himself! Now she's freaking out laying there in nothing much more than a little t-shirt and her drapes wide open and this asshole doesn't give a rat's ass. I jump in at this point and yell for him to give her a bit of respect and decency and shut the damn drapes. He smirks, gives me a look as if to tell me to fuck off and proceeds to drag her onto the stretcher. I run up, grab one drape as another c.a. grabs one too and we pull them shut.
They take her down for a ct scan and I go head hunting for that bastards head. I tell them that the guy is exposing himself and what the sitter did and I wanted her moved from there. I want them both away from her. Then I'm told that they can't!! They can't afford a sitter to sit with just her so if I want her moved then they will however she won't have a sitter for her protection/safety! oh.. but Mr. Expose Himself will have one?? Absolutely!
Their end result to fix this issue is to have Mr. Expose Himself pull his drapes and to change the sitter with another one. The sitter solution was fine by me but every time someone pulled that pigs drapes he pulled them back! That's quite the solution St. Mikes... quite the solution. Now my elderly mom is terrorized by this pig.
"Urban Angel" my ass.. more like the "Devil's Den"
I would take her elsewhere but the problem with that is her family Dr who is simply amazing is with that hospital. Her cardiologist who is also amazing is there too. Her tummy Dr that she's had for 17 years now and knows her literally inside and out.. is also there, as is her arthritis specialist. So.. with that being said, every test, every scan, every scope, every x-ray, every I.N.R., every everything she's had done to her since they closed the beloved Wellesley Hospital is right there at a Dr's fingertips to see. No second guessing, no 50,000 questions, all the answers to their questions are right there in front of them. This isn't available other places. And it can make a difference in her care, especially in the emerg who for the most part, work great. It's once you get upstairs to that general medicine ward that will kill you. Or scar you psychologically for life.
Right now I'm limited with time due to my mom's illness thanks to 2 Dr's at St. Michael's hospital. Dr. Jennifer Watts and Dr. D'Silva, both of the Geriatric dept in there. Don't know D'Silva's first name however I'm sure there aren't too many Dr. D'Sillva's on the Geriatric team during this time period. Young woman. Anyway, don't ever let either one of them touch your loved one. You'll be lucky they don't kill them. If I wasn't there constantly and overseeing most everything I don't believe I would have brought my mom home. What's worse, they wouldn't listen to their patient when she told them not to do something, and not to change her meds. Then they wouldn't listen to me as her Power of Attorney so the long and short of it is this...
1) They took her off her Diltiazem (her heart med) and she was tachycardic twice. Enough to put her on fluids to settle everything down including her blood pressure because that med also regulated her blood pressure.
2) They jacked up her other 2 blood pressure pills because of course they removed her heart med that helped regulate it.
3) They took her off her Lasix (her water pill) and after giving her bolus (large amounts of fluids fast) twice she then had a crackle in her lung which meant there could very well be fluid there. When I got her home her one ankle was swollen one morning and she had fluid filled bags under her eyes and still did by the Friday when I took her to her family Dr.
4) They removed her domperidone for her swallowing issues and in little time it was more difficult for her to swallow too. This means since she's on a liquid diet due to swallowing issues, she's getting less and less calories as time goes one. She definitely lost weight again in there.
5) They removed her from her iron even though her iron was low.
6) They removed her from her pain medications even though we told them not to. They put her on a different one that she can tolerate at very low doses (1 mg) however they were pumping her full of the shit and she simply curled up crying in constant pain and saying she wanted to die. At times she was fairly unresponsive.
7) When I finally lost it on Watt and wrote a letter to her boss D'Silva telling her I wanted Watt to have nothing to do with my mom's care, not to even have consulting privileges didn't D'Silva step in and start bullshitting us too and damn near overdosed her again. This time she said she would agree to putting her back on her old pain meds so she could get some relief and the minute I left the hospital, she cut it back in half and I found this out via the nurse. Next day I took it up with them again and again they said they would start her back on her old pain meds and again reversed it when I left and only gave her one dose for the entire day and only gave her a minimum dose at that. I told them I wanted it started back slowly and each day to add a bit more until we got her back on track but nope.. they'd rather see her suffer. I knew this was a safe way to do it because I spoke to a pharmacist that was well acquainted with my mom and he told me how to do it safely. In the end she was only getting 30 mg of codeine once a day there for a couple of lousy days, in excruciating pain because of it and then this dumbass Dr comes up with pumping 60 mgs all at once into her? Oh goodie, let's just kill her off. The 60 mg's never happened, I wouldn't allow it no matter what.
Something else bizarre happened too and I'm sure it's in regards to those meds they kept pumping into her that were doing nothing but putting her out in some zone never mind even on the planet... on the Saturday she was there she saw yet another Dr. A young man, very nice. While he was talking to me and her (although she wasn't really listening) her jaw started to chatter for lack of a better description. Like someone freezing cold. I never saw anything like that before and told the Dr to look at her. I asked him why it was happening and she's never done that and he didn't know. I'm no Dr but I'm putting it down to the overload of that freakin hydromorphone. At this point in time she was on 3 mg slow acting and throughout a few hours another 5 mgs @ 1 mg per hour. No wonder she didn't know where the hell she was and her jaw was jiggling.
8) Meanwhile Monday morning my mom was complaining that it burned when she peed so this means that the infection was still there and more so so I let them know. For some reason, probably because D'Silva was tired of me, we got a new young Dr who was amazing. She not only ordered a urine test on my mom, she also ordered an x-ray of her lungs since she also heard a crackle in there that she normally doesn't have. Seems D'Silva heard it the day before but chose to ignore that as well.
9) All along my mom had been delusional as well due to the infection but between Watt's and D'Silva it simply didn't matter. It's normal. On my mom's last day there she was even combative and I told D'Silva who reappeared that morning because she wanted my mom out of the hospital regardless of what else was going on. So that morning she was seeing pink turtles on her bed. Little bitty ones. She had not slept one night since she got there which wasn't helping the confusion. It burned when she peed. Her lung had a crackle and she had turned combative but she was going home. And she was in more pain than ever because she wasn't getting proper pain control for a week now. Exactly how long do they think an 88 yr old little lady can tolerate full blown pain?
10) D'Silva called a transport ambulance for her and ordered Cipro for my mom. Even though I had told her that at times it has not worked for my mom. She was so freakin eager to get rid of this little old lady who was now sicker than when she went in there that she didn't even bother to wait for the 2nd part of the test. The "sensitivity" test. This part tells you basically what kind of anti-biotic to use for that particular kind of bacteria. So she just shoves her on Cipro and ships her home @ 1 pm on Tuesday August 12th barely able to smile when she got home .
While home I know something isn't working... my mom is getting sicker. And more hallucinations too. That night she was seeing all sorts of things. People in her room that either owed her $150 or wanted $150. Things on the wall. Mumbling and muttering that I couldn't make any sense of. But of course, we have to remember that all this shit is alright according to Watts & D'Silva. She tries to get out of bed which is nothing short of frightening because she can't walk and will fall again and possibly this time seriously hurt herself. Even her sitter is scared.
I call her family Dr's nurse and leave a message telling her what is going on and Wednesday evening about 9 pm her Dr called me to discuss it. I told him she's getting worse instead of better and as I started to tell him that D'Silva shoved her out the door with Cipro without waiting for the sensitivity test he told me he knew and that's another reason why he's calling, the bacteria isn't sensitive to Cipro, she's on a drug that is doing nothing for her!! He then faxed that night a new prescription for a new antibiotic for her which she started Thursday around noon.
By now though things are not looking good. I take her into our family Dr on Friday afternoon and he's rather dismayed at how she looks. Her bp is ok but not like it normally is. Due to the fact she's not her normal perky self and is barely holding herself up in her wheelchair, she looks pale, guant and is crying at times, he doesn't want to do anything with her meds other than her pain meds for some relief. I have to call him Monday morning again.
All day yesterday and last night she was just laying there.. barely lucid it seemed at times. I was so worried I took her bp and then called the family Dr's service to speak to the Dr on call. Her bp was up and he had me push her back and she was tender. If she has a kidney infection now due to all of this I'll do something even if it's only blog and blog again about those 2 Dr's to save some other family's loved one from their reaches.
Suing isn't an answer. No lawyer out there will take on a case with an elderly person in bad health. A lawyer literally told me this a couple of years ago when I contacted lawyers about my mom and that damn place. He actually told me that no one would take her case because they were afraid that 2 years down the line when the case finally got to court that she would pass away and no one would be able to cover their fee's at that point! I told him that's illegal.. it's ageism... he said that's true but that's why no one would take her case. Listen.. if those asses did it 4 years ago when she had a clear cut case with them the case would be over and done and she would have won I'm sure.
Further to all this.. let me tell you, that before she got the urinary infection that sent her to the hospital this time, for years now her blood pressure has been right on.. her A-Fib has been so well controlled that it is almost undetectable... she had no swelling.. and when her family Dr gave her meds for a urinary infection he always waited for BOTH tests to come back.
It's Sunday August 17th, 2014 and I'm worried that I am going to have to take her back to the hospital. She woke up a bit more alert this morning and took her meds but in the last couple of hours she is waning agqin. I just asked her her name and she couldn't tell me. She is looking sick again. If I take her back I absolutely refuse to let Geriatric's touch her.
Friday, August 8, 2014
end of June 2014
Back we go.. she has another infection but I caught it really fast and she was in and out in 4 days! She had a good Dr that didn't mess with anything and came by frequently. Wish they were all like that. I do believe that his attentiveness helped in her getting home early.
More about Jan/Feb 2014
Things were so crazy I never finished that part of the blog and I've since lost the remarks damn it. If I find them (had a motherboard crash) I'll post them. To finish this particular time in the "Devils' Den"... let me just say by the time I got her home she had lost 18 lbs!! She was tiny to begin with. Since then she never got her same baseline back. She is more forgetful these days. She is terrified of the dark for some reason now and of the hospital. Gee.. I wonder why???
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